


The Sun and the Owl

by RubyRoo_Proper



Category: Dress Up! Time Princess (Video Game)
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, Marriage, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Swan Lake - Freeform, but it's pretty tame stuff, later x-over with other dutp books
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:27:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 32,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27394963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RubyRoo_Proper/pseuds/RubyRoo_Proper
Summary: A series of oneshots, some related, some not, involving the pairing that is our bird-loving princess and goth owl sorcerer.Under the heading of "You want something done, you gotta' do it yourself."
Relationships: Signy/Audwin
Comments: 25
Kudos: 98





	1. Driven to Distraction

**Author's Note:**

> I got impatient! I was going to wait until I'd finished another two or three chapters, but decided I couldn't wait!  
> I'm not really sure how many this work will end up with. I'm just sort of winging it.  
> I haven't even been able to get past chapter 1-12 in the book yet (partly due to the ridiculous scoring system and partly due to the app frequently crashing during the outfit change of that chapter) so I may be getting things wrong. Whatever, just roll with it.

“What are you looking at?” 

Signy didn’t bother looking up. “The Royal Academy's requesting funds.” 

She didn’t hear her husband come in, but that long ceased to surprise her. She felt his presence as he leaned down to read the letter over her shoulder. 

“When are schools _not_ asking for funds?” He muttered. 

“According to this, the astronomy department has made so many repairs to their telescopes that they’re rendered practically useless.” 

“Maybe the celestial bodies are tired of people ogling them.” 

A little smile twitched at the corners of her mouth. “Also, most of their books are outdated.” 

His hands planted against the edge of her desk, arms bracketing her on either side. “I have a few books on the subject just gathering dust. Maybe they can find some use out of them.” 

“It’s astronomy. Not astrolo _gy_.” 

“Tomato, to-mah-to.” 

“Not the same thing.” She insisted. 

His arms gave a slight up and down movement, suggesting he’d shrugged. “What exactly do they hope to discover that humanity can’t live without?” 

“I won’t bother getting into that debate with you. But it’s not just them. The chemistry department needs new equipment. Even you must admit, that’s pretty important.” 

He gave a noncommittal hum. 

“And besides, have you directly implemented _everything_ you learned under the world’s greatest sorcerer?” 

“Yes.” His voice sounded a little closer. 

“Every single thing?” 

“Mm-hm.”

That was all the warning she got before his lips lightly brushed her nape. 

She managed to suppress a shiver, but her smile grew wider. “I seem to remember you swearing up and down that you’d never turned anyone to a toad.” 

“I’ve used the same principle, as you well know.” 

By now his breath was ghosting over her skin, and it was taking a lot of willpower to keep her breathing relaxed and even, as if he wasn’t there. “You also claimed very stringently that you’ve never employed love potions or any other form of red magic.” 

He raised one hand and fiddled with a loose strand of her hair. “There was that dinner made entirely out of aphrodisiacs…” 

She rolled her eyes. “Audwin, anybody with reasonable cooking skills can make a dinner with oysters, asparagus, strawberries, and chocolate. They’re all really popular, you know.” 

“Still,” He planted a soft kiss on the hinge of her jaw that made her eyelids flutter. “It was an application of what I’d learned.” 

Signy’s rebuttal died in her throat when his lips moved to the sensitive spot behind her ear. Now that was just fighting dirty. She tried again, then noticed his hands slowly moved until they covered her own. 

She was probably going to hate herself for doing this, but only for a little bit. 

“No, Audwin.” She said firmly. 

“No what?” 

“You know perfectly well what.” 

“If I did, I wouldn’t ask.” She could feel a smirk in the bunch of muscle in his cheek as it pressed against hers. 

“No, we are _not_ making love in this office.” 

“Farthest thing from my mind.” 

“Could’ve fooled me.” 

“But you’ve got to admit…” 

She turned in her seat, rolling her eyes at his attempting an innocent expression. “Remember when Uncle Arthur walked in on us while I was sitting in your lap. All we were doing was reading papers together, but the poor man nearly had a stroke.” 

He chuckled. “I didn’t know the symptoms of a potential stroke include squawking like a parrot and running off yelling ‘God Almighty!’” 

“He wouldn’t look me in the eye for _days_! Do you know how hard it is to get things done when your Chief Minister won’t make eye contact?” 

Audwin scoffed. “The man’s a prude. And that door has a lock, you know.” 

“Even so, I’m not going to risk anyone even _hearing_ us go at it in here.” 

“Maybe if we were especially quiet…” 

She flushed a little. “You and I both know we couldn’t if our lives depended on it.” 

He pouted. She’d be lying if she said it wasn’t adorable. “You’re no fun at all.” 

She just smiled and returned to her papers. “You seemed to think differently the other night.” 

A melodramatic sigh. “Fifty-four, Signy.” 

“What?” 

“That’s how many times we’ve done it in the two months we’ve been married. Only fifty-four.” 

“That many?” 

“That’s not even an average of once a day!” 

She looked at him again, incredulous. “The problem with that being…?” 

He sat himself on the edge of her desk, arms crossed. “Isn’t this what most people would call the honeymoon phase?” 

“I’m a little vague on that detail.” 

He put a hand to his forehead. “I understand you’ve got a lot of responsibilities as heir apparent, and we’ve both got our limits. But a man can only take so much…” 

Signy shook her head, but smiled. 

A large part of it was probably how long he’d spent without affection or simple physical contact with another person. He’d deny it ‘till the cows came home, but at times he’d get a little clingy, though he tried very hard not to be. 

“Tonight.” She conceded. 

“What?” 

She gave him a look that was all business. “We’ll do it tonight.” 

His eyebrows nearly disappeared in his hairline. “We will?” 

“Yes, definitely.” She smiled and poked him in the cheek with the blunt end of her fountain pen. “But in the privacy of our own room.” 

He graced her with a wolfish smile. “I’ll hold you to that promise, Princess.”

“Good. Now _get_.” 

He planted a quick kiss on her cheek before practically strutting out of her study, and she was rolling her eyes yet again. 

“I need to discuss something real quickly with Signy. Is she too busy?” she heard Ms. Roslin ask him right after the doors closed. 

“I don’t think so. We’ve just been… negotiating a joint project.” 

“I bet you were.” Came the older woman’s sardonic response. 

Signy clamped a hand over her mouth to stifle the giggles, also blushing a little at the thought of what her former governess would’ve seen had she not held her ground. 

_Close call._


	2. Fairytale

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something a little sappier.

“What time is it?” 

Audwin glanced at his daughter’s inquisitive face. “Any reason why?” 

“I wanna’ know when bedtime is.” 

He glanced at the mantel clock. “Not for another five hours.” 

To his surprise, Gerda actually looked put out. “Five? That’s forever!” 

“Not even close. And last I checked, you _hated_ going to bed with a burning passion.” 

“I do.” She said, with all the seriousness of a politician discussing something unpopular, like the need to raise taxes. “But I want someone to read my new book.” 

He cracked a smile. “People can read any time of day, not just before going to sleep.”

Her eyes widened. “Oh yeah! Can you read it to me?” 

He pretended to mull it over. “I suppose…” 

“Come on!” She grabbed his hand and pulled him from his chair to the nursery, leading him to the armchair that had been unofficially designated as the Story-Reading-Chair, whereupon sat the new book she’d mentioned. 

Then Audwin saw the title and frowned. 

“...The Frog Prince?” 

“Uh-huh.” Gerda picked it up and held it out to him. He took it with great reluctance, glaring at the blue cover with a gold crowned frog. 

“Where did you get this?” 

“Uncle Aldous gave it to me last time he was here.” 

Audwin froze. “He what?” 

She smiled obliviously. “He said it would be even more fun if you were the first person to read it to me.” 

Audwin fought back a sneer. He could picture the insufferable innocent smile that no doubt had graced that insufferable face when Aldous gifted the book. 

_Well played, you magnificent bastard._

“Does your mother know about it?” 

“She thought it was a good idea.” 

“Of course.” 

She picked up on his annoyance too easily. “Daddy? What’s wrong?” 

“Nothing.” He said hastily, holding the book out as if had an offensive odor. “You’re sure you don’t want me to read you something else? _Anything_ else?” 

She nodded eagerly. “I’ve never heard this one!” 

There was a damn good reason for that. 

“Please Dad? _Pllleeeeeaaassssseeee_?” She went for the kill, widening those blasted crystal-blue eyes that he could hardly refuse… not on her or her mother. 

“Oh fine.” He groaned. 

“Yay!”

He sat in the chair and let her clamber into his lap before opening to the first page. Might as well get it over with. 

He fought the urge to roll his eyes at the insipid illustration of a young crowned girl of some indeterminable age, anywhere from eight to fifteen (how did these illustrators not find that remotely disturbing?) with a vaguely medieval-ish dress and a ball cradled in her hands. 

“Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess, who was loved and spoiled by her parents and given everything her heart desired. She had many pretty toys, but her favorite was a golden ball.” 

“Could it bounce?” Gerda interrupted. 

“What?” 

“Could the golden ball bounce, like my red rubber ball?” 

“It doesn’t say, but gold doesn’t bounce nearly as well as rubber.” 

She looked thoughtful. ‘Doesn’t sound very fun, then.” 

“It was golden. It didn’t need to do _anything_. Now can I continue?” 

Gerda nodded. 

“One day she was outside playing with her beloved golden ball and passed by a well, when suddenly the ball fell from her hands into the water.” 

“Oh no!” 

“Relax. She gets it back.” 

“Have you heard this before?” 

“A… really long time ago.” 

“Keep going!” 

“Obviously, she was pretty upset by this, and she sat by the well, crying and carrying on, as if her father couldn’t just bloody well get her a new one...” 

“Daddy!” She gave him a scolding look. “It doesn’t say that!” 

“How would you know? You can’t read.”

“Nobody says that in the books when Mommy or Nana Roslin read to me.” 

“You’re too smart, you know that? Fine. The princess sat and cried over the loss of her favorite toy. After a few minutes, she heard a strange voice ask, ‘Princess, why are you crying?’” 

“What did the voice sound like?” Gerda interrupted again. 

This question usually meant she was going to ask him to imitate whatever he said it sounded like whenever the frog spoke. “Like… my voice.” 

Her eyes widened. “Your voice?” 

“Exactly like my voice. So, anyway, she looked around her, but couldn’t see anyone there. She was all alone except for a little green bullfrog. Then, to her surprise, the bullfrog spoke in the voice she heard, saying, ‘Please tell me so I can help.’” 

“After rallying over the no doubt tremendous shock of hearing an amphibian speak, she said ‘Sir Frog, I’ve lost my beautiful golden ball down the well!’ To which he replied ‘Serves you right for being so careless with a toy worth more than a farmer makes in a year!’” 

“You’re doing it again!” 

He smiled innocently. “Just making sure you’re paying attention.” 

“Please stop.” 

“Alright. What he really said was, ‘Dry your tears fair Princess! I can dive into the well and get it for you!’” 

“The Princess said, ‘Would you please? I’d be most grateful!’ The frog said solemnly ‘First, you must promise me something in return. If I get your golden ball, you must promise to make me your best friend, let me eat from your plate at dinner and sleep on your pillow…’” 

And so the inane tale continued. From the bratty princess forgetting her promise within minutes and running off to leave the frog behind, only to have him follow her home and demand to go inside, etcetera. 

Finally, they reached the climax (if you could even call it that) of the tale, when the princess decided she’d had enough of the frog’s demands, picked him up, and hurled him against the wall. 

Gerda was horrified. “What?! That’s so mean! She could really hurt him that way!” 

“Yes. But fortunately, this is fiction, so not only was he unharmed, but he transformed before her very eyes into a prince.” 

“Really?” Gerda looked relieved, then confused. “How did she know he was a prince?” 

Audwin shrugged. “Beats me. Maybe he was wearing a crown. Anyway, the prince stood and bowed, saying ‘Princess, you have saved my life! An evil witch turned me into a frog, and your… er, love broke the spell!’” 

“Love?” Gerda scrunched up her nose. “By throwing him?” 

“The people who wrote this were very strange, Love. And maybe a little disturbed.” 

“Did Mommy ever throw you?” 

“Of course not.” 

Though he was sure she’d fantasized about it a time or two. 

“At least he’s not hurt.” Gerda said. 

“Well, yes, there’s that. So, the prince and princess got married and… hmm?” He frowned in surprise. “There’s two more pages?” 

“There’s more?” 

“Apparently.” That was weird. The version he’d been told ended at the marriage of the protagonists. 

“It seems the Prince had a loyal servant named Henry, who loved his master so much that, when the witch cursed him, Henry had iron bars fitted around his chest to keep his heart from breaking.” 

“Oh no!”Ggerda declared sadly. 

“Henry was overjoyed to learn that, not only was his master free of the spell, but had married as well. He fetched the newly married couple in a carriage to take them to the prince’s kingdom. As they went along, the prince and princess heard a loud, horrible cracking sound. The prince yelled, ‘Henry! The carriage is breaking!’” 

“But the servant only laughed and cried, ‘No Your Highness! It's only the iron bars breaking, because my heart is whole again!’” 

Gerda gave a small cheer. “He’s happy again!” 

Audwin stared at the book, at the simple illustration of the servant atop the carriage, looking as if he were merely telling the passengers that they’d arrived at their intended destination. 

As if he hadn’t just experienced one of the most painful and beautiful things in this world. 

“Daddy?” 

He cleared his throat. “Sorry. So, the prince, princess, and Henry lived happily ever after. The end.” 

“That was great! Can you read it again?” 

“Not for now. Maybe for bed.” He offered. 

“Okay.” She nodded. 

“In the meantime, would you put this book where it belongs?” 

“Yes, Daddy.” She climbed out of his lap and took the book to the shelves. 

Audwin watched her, feeling suddenly melancholy at the reminder of how close she came to not existing. 

For the first couple of months into her parents’ marriage, they’d been spouses in name only, due to Audwin’s conniving and trickery, he and Signy enemies locked together in a battle of wits and wills. 

But then, slowly, inexplicably, everything began to change. More importantly, he did. And suddenly, it seemed, he realized that he had fallen in love for the first time in his twenty-four years. 

So he ran.

Ran from the terrifying power she had over him. From the alien emotions that seemed too big for any mortal body. Fled to his tower in the woods. 

Of course she found him, a few days later. Eyes spilling with tears as she scolded him for his cowardice and begged him to please come back because she _missed_ him. 

He remembered the realization that, in spite of everything, she had come to love him back. 

The emotions were so intense, he’d honestly thought he would die. 

The pain of a broken, shattered heart being rebuilt by a gentle hand. 

So he went back, for her. 

Lucky he did, because that was when Prince-What’s-His-Name from Gloriana declared war on the kingdom, sent an army to take the royal family hostage, and Audwin was forced to use his powers to their very limits to protect everyone. 

The energy from it left him so weak, he’d slept for four days straight. They were all sure, he’d been told, that he wouldn’t make it. But he did, obviously. Awakening to the beautiful sight of her beaming face, and the feel of her slender hands on his own face before she kissed him. 

As soon as his strength rallied, they became husband and wife in the fullest sense, and in a few short months were greeting their daughter. 

Had everything happened just a little bit differently, a little sooner or a little later, he was fairly certain Gerda wouldn't exist. 

* * *

He found Signy outside, tending her own personal garden of wildflowers she’d planted herself. 

These days, between ruling the country and being a mother, she rarely found time to go into her beloved forest. So she did the next best thing and created a little patch of nature she could care for just a short walk outside. 

There sat one of the most powerful women in Europe, her head topped with a wide-brimmed straw hat, an old apron covering her dress, large gloves on her dainty hands, and a smear of dirt on her golden cheek. 

God, she was lovely. 

He stepped closer, clearing his throat to catch her attention. 

“Hi, Audwin.” She smiled sweetly over her shoulder before rising to her feet and planting a light kiss on his cheek. “How’s your afternoon been?” 

“Your daughter asked me to read her an interesting book.” 

“ _My_ daughter?” She raised an eyebrow. “Where do you think she got her hair, or that chin? And that impish smile certainly doesn’t come from my side of the family.” 

He gave her a pointed look. “The Princess and the Frog? Really?” 

“Oh, that.” Her eyes sparkled with mischief. “She finally told you about it?” 

“Aldous is on borrowed time.” 

“Don’t take it personally. He’s just trying to have fun with you.” She removed her gloves and winked at him. “You have to admit, it’s pretty funny.” 

“Not even remotely.” 

Before she could say anything else, he cupped her face in his hands and kissed her. 

“Hmm.” She smiled when they parted. ‘What was that for?” 

“To say thank you… for breaking my iron bars.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... And then hit them with the feels.


	3. I've Got Your Back

Meeting with foreign diplomats was... not something Audwin enjoyed. 

As in, getting his nails pulled out with pliers would probably be less excruciating. 

But, as people kept reminding him, it was something that went with the job of being consort of the future monarch. 

So, for the sake of his wife and beyond-gracious father in law, he sat through these interminable meetings and didn't complain _too_ much. And if he entertained himself by imagining what animals or inanimate objects he'd like to turn these windbags into so he wouldn't fall asleep, nobody had to know that.

This meeting, however, he had no trouble staying awake. His burning hatred for Archduke Felix Albert– the Prince of Ingoldingen's youngest son and current ambassador– was giving him plenty of energy.

Archduke Felix had made his distain for the sorcerer pretty clear from the get-go. Not in anything obvious, of course, but hidden in carefully chosen words, cold smiles that didn't reach his eyes, and insults and insinuations disguised as jokes.

"You're a lucky man, you know that? Dozens of men vying for her hand, and she picked _you_. How _did_ you manage it? I don't suppose a love potion was involved." 

"I guess I'd better watch my tongue. Wouldn't want to get turned into a newt or something. Ha ha!" 

"Now how did you find out you were royalty again? Because people can be skeptical about that kind of thing. Not me of course."

On and on.

The man knew exactly what he was doing. He made sure to save these jabs for when nobody who'd believe Audwin was within earshot, so if the prince consort said anything Felix could claim it was all a misunderstanding. 

By the end of the day, Audwin was ready to strangle the bastard with his bare hands, international incident be damned.

The final straw was after dinner, when the weasel "accidentally " spilled wine in Audwin's lap and adopted a look of mock embarrassment that was almost insulting in it's obviousness. 

"Oops! Really sorry about that! I'm such a klutz! Always spilling and dropping things...!" 

That. Was. It. 

Audwin slowly rose to his feet, forcing a grin on his face. "Don't worry about it, Your Grace. Accidents happen. " 

Confusion replaced smugness on the other man's face. 

"In fact... I think I can help you. " 

He raised a hand and muttered a short spell before shoving his palm in the man's direction. 

The Archduke had just enough time to realize he'd made a terrible mistake before his whole body froze and became as still as a painting, the alarmed look still on his face. 

Though he couldn't move, he still had all his senses. So Audwin took vindictive enjoyment in smiling and saying, "There. I don't think you'll be spilling anything like that. Though you might need occasional dusting." 

" _AUDWIN!"_

Oh. Right. There were other people in the room. 

A quick glance proved that Signy, as her tone implied, was furious, the other diplomats were terrified (the ambassador of Milan actually fainted when Audwin faced them), and the king and chief minister wore matching looks of, "This again? Good grief. " 

He was in for it now. 

Signy set her goblet on the end table with more force than necessary, splashing wine on the marble. "Hallway, now!" 

He bit back the comment that she didn't need to treat him like a naughty child, because doing so wouldn't help him in the slightest.

As soon as they were out of earshot from the drawing room she rounded on him and demanded "What in God's name was that for?! A poor man spilled his drink and you turn him into a living statue?!"

He sighed. "No. He spent the whole day giving backhanded comments and compliments and _then_ spilled. On purpose!" 

"What are you talking about?" 

"All day he's been saying things like how convenient it is that I learned my relationship with royalty when I did, or asking if I used magic to, quote, 'ensnare' you!" 

He expected her to tell him it was no big deal, and to just shrug it off and act like a grownup. Instead, her demeanor softened. 

"He really said that?" 

"That's just scratching the surface! He's been at it since this morning! Of course he's made sure it's my word against his and tried to play them off as jokes, but mark my words, he's no fan of mine."

Signy looked stricken. "Oh Audwin, I'm so sorry! I had no idea." 

He shrugged. "It's not your fault. I'm an adult, I should handle it myself." 

She laughed incredulously. "By putting a spell on him?" 

"It's served me well in the past. I don't see what good it would've done to bother you with it."

"That's what spouses do! They tell each other when something or someone is bothering them! And I could've done something about it!" 

Well, he was taken aback. "Like what?" 

A determined look came to her eye. "Watch, and follow my lead." 

Curious, he followed her back to the drawing room, where she pasted a smile on her face. 

“We’re sorry for this interruption, everyone.” She said. “But Prince Audwin and I have had a very illuminating discussion and worked it all out.” She turned to the still-unmoving archduke. “We’re especially sorry to you, Your Grace. Audwin, could you please release the gentleman?”

He undid the spell, and the archduke nearly collapsed on the floor, sweating and gasping as if he’d been holding his breath the whole time.

“Are you feeling alright?” Signy asked him.

“I… y-yes, Your R-Royal Highness.” He stammered, eyes darting nervously in Audwin’s direction.

“I’m afraid this is all a terrible misunderstanding.” Signy explained. “My husband was convinced your action was done on purpose and that you’ve been insulting him all day.”

“Oh no! Of course not!” He blustered. 

“Of course not.” Audwin echoed, smiling at the man. 

“You couldn’t possibly be that daft.” Signy told the duke, smiling sweetly but eyes sharp.

“Er… no…”

“I mean, alienating the beloved husband of a ruler you’re trying to remain in good graces with? How short-sighted would you have to be?”

“Very.” The man admitted, in a tiny voice.

“Of course, you know I’d never stand for it. And I’m sure your father and his council wouldn’t either.”

“N-no, Your Highness.” The duke was barely audible at this point.

“In other words,” Her smile dropped and eyes narrowed. “If you insult him, you’re insulting me. Understood, Your Grace?”

He gave a meek nod.

“Good!” She smiled again. “Now, shall we all pick up where we left off?”

“B-begging your pardon, Ma’am.” The duke simpered. “I’m afraid I’m not feeling too well at the moment…” He shot another nervous glance at Audwin. “If I could please be excused?”

“What a shame. Of course you may be excused.”

The archduke all but ran out of the drawing room. Signy smoothed out some non-existent wrinkles from her dinner dress.

“Well, glad that’s over with.” 

* * *

Later that evening, once they were alone in their bedroom, he kissed his wife and told her, "Woman, you're incredible." 

"Hardly." Signy chuckled before growing serious. "Just promise me we'll talk about these things from now on. Even if we can't always stop bad things from happening to each other, we can help shoulder it. That's what loved ones do." 

"So, if someone treats you like dirt, I can turn them into a worm?" 

"No." She said flatly. "But you can listen when I rant and complain about it and give your support. And I will do the same with you. not only me, but everyone who cares about you: Father, Aldous, Uncle Arthur, and Ms. Roslin." 

He briefly remembered something he'd said to her what seemed like a lifetime ago, that night she'd found his hiding place with the purpose of either negotiating or killing him. 

_"As queen, you cannot show these emotions to your subjects, so you're more to be pitied."_

How little he knew. 

"I guess I've still got a lot to learn." 

"No rush." She smiled. 'We've got the rest of our lives to learn from each other.


	4. Compromises

“You’re joking, right? Tell me you’re joking.” 

The poor tailor was practically tying his measuring tape in knots. “I… I’m afraid not, Sir.” 

“They expect me to wear _that_? In front of everyone?” 

“Is it really that much more ridiculous from what you usually wear?” Signy asked her fiancé 

Audwin glared at the offending sash, medals, and ornaments. “At least my normal clothes don’t _jingle_ when I walk.” 

All this fuss over the wedding costume (for the do-over wedding) he was expected to wear as new Prince Consort. One look, and he decided he was having none of it. 

“But,” The tailor started nervously, “It’s tradition…” 

“So was burning people for witchcraft. I’m sure we can all agree not to bring _that_ back.” 

Signy chuckled, fondly exasperated. “Don’t you think you’re making a bit of a mountain out of that molehill, Dear?” 

“I’ll look stupid in that getup.” He chuffed, arms crossed. 

“Well, what exactly were you wanting to wear at our wedding? Which, I might remind you, will be one of the biggest social events in Europe.” 

He scrunched his face in distaste. “Something less… _twinkly_. And that doesn’t jingle.” He glanced down at himself. “Something like this, but more formal.” 

The tailor shot Signy an imploring look. 

“We could try something that’s a little more in-between.” She suggested. 

He looked at her like she’d started speaking Latin. “Why?” 

She took a deep breath. “Because, if it were up to me, the whole thing would be much simpler. But we’re royalty, so there’s going to be thousands of guests, dozens of ambassadors and foreign dignitaries who will be scrutinizing the whole thing down to the last detail, a long banquet that will last for hours, and I will be expected to wear a thirty- to forty-foot train.” 

“But,” She continued. “I’m not complaining. I’m just finding a way to compromise. For one thing, instead of enough diamonds to sink a sailboat like most royal brides, I’ll be wearing my mother’s favorite pearl set.” 

“Compromise?” he raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t that just another way of saying ‘giving in’?” 

“No, it means meeting somewhere halfway. Neither party completely wins, but neither party really loses.” 

He shook his head. “I don’t see much difference.” 

“She’s right, though.” The tailor said earnestly. “I mean, I know it’s absolutely none of my business, but willingness to compromise is a huge part of a successful marriage.” 

Audwin gave him a dubious look. “I wasn’t aware you were an expert on the subject.” 

“Well,” The older man chuckled, “I have been happily married for thirty-five years, so I’d think I’d know a thing or two. And let me tell you, the worst fights my wife and I ever had were when neither of us were willing to swallow our pride and quit being stubborn.” 

Audwin still looked skeptical, but Signy could tell he was thinking it over. 

“If you really don’t want to jingle, we can do without most of the medals.” She suggested. “And maybe we could pick colors you’d like better.” 

“I’ll... think about it.” He said. 

“That’s all I ask.” She kissed him on the cheek, making the tailor blush and avert his gaze. 

In the end, he’d forgone all but one of the medals, exchanged the bright colors for darker and more subdued blacks and midnight blues, gotten rid of the epaulettes, and… to her amusement… put that darned feathered cloak over all of it. 

Personally, she thought he looked amazing. 

* * *

“If you’d just listen…” 

“I am listening. You’re the one that’s not listening.” 

“But Audwin…!” 

“I know what’s best for my crows, Signy!” 

Three of the aforementioned birds watched their master and mistress argue, rather hoping the latter would win. 

“They were hungry!” 

“Yes,” The sorcerer groaned, pinching the narrow bridge of his nose. “But they need to stay self-sufficient. How can they do that if you’re coddling them like a bunch of canaries?” 

One of the crows cawed. 

“You stay out of this!” Audwin snapped at it. 

“What if they can’t find enough food?” Signy demanded. 

“They’re some of the smartest animals on the face of the earth! They can always find _something_!” 

She crossed her arms. “What about those other animals I’ve fed?” 

“That’s different.” 

“How?” 

“Why am I even arguing with you about this?” 

Signy looked at the birds. “I can’t stand the thought of letting someone go hungry if I can do something to help them. Even if that someone’s a bird.” 

“There’s nothing wrong with that. I just don’t want them to get spoiled and lazy.” 

“I won’t let that happen!” She insisted. “I just want to make sure they’re all getting enough.” 

He thought back to their conversation over his wedding outfit. What had that tailor said? 

He wasn’t used to giving in. But, she said it was neither party really losing. 

“I’d be willing to compromise.” HE said. 

She grinned. “Really?” 

“Once every couple of weeks.” He held up a finger. “No more.” 

“That sounds perfectly reasonable.” Signy agreed. 

“And none of this.” He gestured at the bag of birdseed she’d brought along. “A few seeds and grains won’t provide them with all the nutrition they need.” 

“Fair enough. I’ll think of something.” 

“I’m sure you will.” He sighed, but actually felt better with this outcome. Maybe there was something to this whole thing. 

Signy turned to the crow trio. “Any suggestions?” 

One of them squawked. 

“No.” Audwin said flatly. “Don’t be ridiculous.” 

“What did they say?” 

“She was suggesting cake.” 

Signy burst into laughter. 

* * *

“...Excuse me?” 

“You’re excused.” 

Signy looked up in time to see Ms. Roslin’s gaze sharpen at Audwin. “I don’t appreciate being called ‘Rosie.’” 

“Why not?” He asked. “It’s such a cheerful name.” 

“Be that as it may…” 

“And tacking the ‘Ms.’ in front just sounds too stiff and formal, especially considering I’m practically your son-in-law.” 

“The woman who is practically my daughter has no problem with it.” 

Signy decided to step in before things got… ridiculous. “Audwin?” 

He looked over his shoulder. “Mind waiting a second? I’m negotiating with you-know-who right now.” 

The woman in question developed a faint tic in her eyebrow, one that Signy had been noticing quite frequently these days. 

“That’s exactly what I wanted to talk to you about. Remember that whole, ‘compromise’ thing?” 

He raised his eyebrows, then turned back to Signy’s former governess. “How about we go halfway? 'Ms. Rosie', or just plain 'Roslin'?” 

The woman sighed. “I fail to see why this is such an issue.” 

“I was just thinking the same thing.” 

She crossed her arms, mouth pursed in disapproval. “If you insist on being obstinate, I suppose I can stand ‘Roslin.’” 

“Or,” Audwin began. “We could keep the ‘Ms.’, and you address me as ‘Master Audwin’?” 

“Will you knock it off?” Signy scolded him. 

“I was just joking. Isn't’ that how most people smooth things over?” 

Ms. Roslin wearily rubbed her temple. “Fifteen. That is how many gray hairs I’ve found in my brush since you two got married. Fifteen.” 

“Do you actually count them all?” Audwin asked, irrepressible. 

“... I can feel number sixteen coming.” 

* * *

Signy’s first couple of visits to the tower Audwin had made his lair were under emotionally wrought circumstances, so it wasn’t until perhaps the third time she’d darkened it’s doors that she noticed just how dirty some of the rooms were. 

She wasn’t fastidious by any means, even at her age she still tended to leave things lying around. But when she couldn’t enter some rooms without getting dust in her eyes and getting into fits of sneezing or coughing, and the dust and cobwebs obscured the labels of some containers, she decided something should be done about it. 

Bringing maids from the castle probably wasn’t the best course, and asking Audwin to clean it himself when she was hardly there as often as he was seemed to be… nagging. So she decided to buckle down and do some of it herself. 

Some items she would need to avoid touching, so there would still be a lot of grime left, but it would be a start. Maybe once he saw how much better it looked, she could convince him to finish. 

So, dressed in an old wool kirtle, her braid wrapped in a kerchief, she brought a duster, rags, and filled a bucket with soapy water. 

It was a major undertaking. Opening all the windows and doors, carefully chasing away the spiders and mice, she ended up getting a lot of dust up her nose, and had to rinse out the rags and change the water every few minutes. 

She didn’t touch any instruments she didn’t know the functions of, or containers that were unlabeled or holding something clearly dangerous. The bottles and jars she did touch were handled with great care, to avoid ruining something rare or valuable. 

After three hours, her back was aching and her fingers were hurting, but she kept going. The work was incredibly satisfying, and there was a chance she wouldn’t be able to convince him to clean where she left off. 

She realized her mistake when her stiff fingers failed to properly grip a clay jar, knocking it over and causing it to roll off the shelf before she could catch it. It shattered on the floor and released a chemical smell. 

“Damn!” She hissed. 

Its contents appeared to be some kind of mollusk or small organ suspended in a preserving solution. Formaldehyde, Signy guessed. She leaned closer to get a better look. 

“ _DON’T_!” 

Audwin’s shout made her scream and leap backwards, hitting her head on another shelf. “Ow!” 

“Don’t look at it!” He grabbed the rag from her and, keeping his eyes averted, used it to cover the object. 

“What was that?” 

He glared at her. “That was a basilisk’s eye! If you’d looked at the right angle it would’ve turned you to stone!” 

“What?!” 

“And I don’t have most of the materials required to reverse it! What in Blazes were you thinking?!” 

“I don’t know, I was just cleaning…” 

“Cleaning? Do you even know what half of this stuff does?!” 

‘No!” She said sharply. “Which is why I’ve been really careful up to this point! Give me some credit, Audwin!” 

“And yet you came this close,” He held his thumb and forefinger half a centimeter apart, “To becoming a statue! Just to tidy up a bit!” 

“Don’t treat me like an idiot!” She snapped. “If you’d run a rag over these things once in a while…” 

He planted a hand on his hip, scoffing. “It was this way when I inherited it. I hardly spend any time here anymore, since I moved to the castle.” 

“But how can you work in it?” 

“I’m used to it. You’re the only one who has a problem with it, and you’re hardly ever here.” 

She waved her arms to indicate the space around them. “Maybe I want to come here more often.” 

“Why?” 

“Because _you’re_ here, you git! And this place is important to you! That makes it important to me!” 

“Oh.” He blinked owlishly (no pun intended). “That… didn’t occur to me.” 

Signy sighed. “It’s depressing to think of you doing the things you love while surrounded by such squalor. You deserve better.” 

His face softened a bit. “I just don’t want you to get hurt. A lot of these things are pretty damn dangerous.” 

“I know. I really was trying to be careful with everything. I just had a lapse in judgement there.” 

He bent down and carefully bundled up the eye with the rag. After a bit of searching, he found an empty lidded jar and placed it inside. 

“I’m sorry if I ruined that.” Signy apologized. 

“I could always get another one. You on the other hand, are irreplaceable.” 

She smiled a little. “You don’t think I’d make a nice lawn ornament?” 

“On the contrary,” He smirked. “You’d look quite lovely installed in the palace gardens, right next to the lilies.” 

“I know I would.” Signy giggled. 

He looked around, and sighed. “Fine. You’ve twisted my arm.” 

Before she could say anything else, he snapped his fingers and uttered an incantation, and her jaw dropped as every single particle of dust rose into the air. 

It all flew from each room into the hallway until it formed a large cloud, which then flew out the window, leaving the entire tower spotless within the space of two minutes. 

Signy gawped at her surroundings. “You… you can…?” 

“What? You think I never learned cleaning spells? It’s child’s play!” 

Her eyes narrowed. “ _You_..” 

“I see your point. It looks much better this … HEY!” 

She started whapping him with one of the rags. “THREE HOURS! I SLAVE AWAY FOR TREE HOURS AND THIS WHOLE TIME YOU COULD’VE GOTTEN IT DONE IN A MINUTE WITH A SNAP OF YOUR FINGERS?!” 

“Signy! For God’s sake!” 

* * *

The number of compromises grew, day by day, until they barely even noticed anymore. 

He had to attend council meetings, but he was allowed to roll his eyes when he was sure nobody could see him doing so, and refer to the Duke of Coddlem as 'The Walking Bagpipe' when it was just him and Signy. 

She could name the creatures he’d created, but she had to run them by him first. He wasn’t fond of calling the bear-lion hybrid ‘Julius.’ 

He could go for flights at night, as long as he let her know ahead of time so she wouldn’t wonder where he was. 

She could walk in and out of the bathing room while he was in the tub, and he could borrow some of her soap (Not the gardenia-scented one, but he didn’t care for smelling like flowers anyway).

He could run his fingers through her tresses as long as there wasn’t a fancy function or dinner she was attending later.

She could kiss him in front of other people (he found himself getting used to it). 

She could bury her face in his shoulder, in his chest, whenever she was feeling stressed and wanted to just enjoy a moment of silence. He could lay the two of them in bed and curl up around her like a giant cat when he had a similar problem. 

She stopped expecting him to say ‘I love you’ in front of others. He said it often enough in private, and didn’t always need words. 

* * *

“ _Lillith_?” 

“It means ‘Night owl.’” 

“It’s also the name of a witch demon who fornicates with sleeping men. Sorry Audwin, but that’s a hard no from me.” 

He sighed. “Still way more original than something like Anne, Mary, or Elizabeth.” 

“I _like_ Elizabeth.” Signy protested. 

“Unfortunately, so does the rest of Europe.” He pointed out. “Call that name in a gathering of royals, and half the room will answer.” 

Signy closed her book, smiling in amusement. “You’ve got a point. But we’re still not naming any daughter of ours after a demon. Assuming we’re really having one in the first place.” 

He gestured at her slightly thickened waistline. “Trust me on this. Sorcerers know these kind of things.” 

“Well, we’ve still got at least five months to figure out a name we both like.” 

“Hopefully something a little unique...” 

“But not too strange...” 

“That doesn’t sound boring and stuffy...” 

“Or belong to some figure in history or mythology famous for something unpleasant...” 

“...Or is too frilly either.” 

They both stared into the fire crackling in the grate. 

“I had no idea this sort of thing was so damn hard.” Audwin murmured. 

“We’ll get there in good time.” She patted his knee. “Maybe if we wrote a list…” 

“Two lists. One of names we agree on, and one of names we don’t.” 

“Perfect.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My own personal headcanon is Signy spoiling the crows rotten (much to Audwin's chagrin).


	5. Don't Go to bed Angry

Signy was in the castle library when the argument started. 

The frustrated voices of her dear but bullheaded husband and their wonderful but equally obstinate youngest carried down the hall, and she gave a sigh. 

“What is it this time?” She asked Milo when he stepped in to grab a book. 

Her second-born shrugged. “Father scared off another potential suitor. A real daffodil.” 

“And for that, the boy deserved to be terrorized?” 

“He told Minny her dress was flattering.” Milo said as he perused the shelves. “Father said he couldn’t know that without looking where he shouldn’t, and it all went downhill from there. I mean, I didn’t like the kid either, but it was ridiculous.” 

“You know how he is about your sisters.” 

The teenager snorted. “As if they couldn’t handle themselves.” He found the volume he was looking for and left the room. 

Indeed. 

But it was far more than overprotectiveness where Menodora was concerned. 

Their third child and second daughter, she’d always been strong-willed and passionate, which translated to quarrelsomeness once she reached the age of twelve. And few people butted heads with her quite as much as her father. 

It was nothing new or concerning for the other residents of the castle. Prince Audwin and Princess Menodora would bicker, then cool off and make amends. Life went on. 

Lately the biggest bone of contention between the two was the underwhelming specimens of manhood she’d been allowing to court her. It wasn’t like she got anywhere remotely serious with any of them, they were all just adolescents enjoying a bit of harmless fun. 

But Audwin, probably remembering how he and Signy met, was convinced that if their fourteen-year-old wasn’t extremely vigilant, she’d be taken advantage of sooner or later. Of course, said fourteen-year-old chafed at this and wasn’t afraid to say so. 

Audwin was convinced her passionate nature was due to being born on the night of a blue moon… hence her unusual name, meaning ‘Gift of the moon’ in Greek. 

But Signy believed it had more to do with the fact Menodora probably owed her existence to a fight between her parents. 

She couldn’t remember exactly what it had been about. Her father had passed recently and everyone was still mourning, which was undoubtedly why she was easy to upset at that time. 

Well, it didn’t matter how it started, only that it quickly grew heated and ridiculous and they said a lot of things she wished they could take back. When it ended she shut herself in their room, fighting back angry tears, and he was flying off into the woods to clear his head.

Not the first argument they’d had, and certainly not the last. But for a few hours she stubbornly hung onto her anger and told herself she wouldn’t be the first to apologize. No, that would wait until he came crawling back and begged for forgiveness. 

Thankfully, she gradually cooled off and was willing to accept that she was equally to blame, remembering that holding onto her pride wasn’t worth the wedge it would drive between them. 

So she waited for him to come back, ready to say sorry. And waited. And waited… 

Normally, he wouldn’t have been gone for nearly as long. But as the sun set and he still hadn’t deigned to show his miserable face, she grew angry again for a whole different reason. 

Gerda and Milo kept asking where he went and if he was alright (well, Milo only knew five words at the time, but he was clearly thinking it). Signy let them stay a little bit past their bedtime to comfort and assure them that everything was fine and their father would be coming home soon, though she herself was believing it less and less. 

All kinds of dreadful scenarios flooded her head: He’d been terribly injured. Captured by a rival sorcerer. He was _dead_. 

The deepest, darkest one of all was that he’d abandoned them. It seemed foolish now, but at the moment… 

She longed for him to come back so she could yell at him for scaring everyone, then forgive him and never let him go. 

Audwin finally limped home around ten o’clock, clutching a small bouquet of her favorite wildflowers and looking like something the cat dragged in. 

“You will not believe what fresh hell I’ve been through today!” He’d declared. “These are for you, by the way.” 

After she’d finished yelling and crying and kissing the daylights out of him, he explained that, focusing on his anger, he hadn’t been paying nearly enough attention to his surroundings as he should have, otherwise he would’ve noticed the giant wyrm stalking him before it pounced and clamped its jaws around what it thought to be an ordinary, if large, owl. 

Fighting the persistent reptile had taken the better part of the afternoon, after which he’d collapsed in exhaustion, and found it was night when he woke up. 

They briefly woke up the children so they could see he was back in one piece. After that Signy helped him bathe and wash off the smell of wyrm spittle, treating his bruises and cuts.

The whole time she swung between relief he was back, and the ache of how close she’d come to losing him with the final words between them said in anger. 

After making sure he wasn’t too tired, she pulled him to bed in order to make amends and remind them both that, for all the ways they clashed, there were many more ways in which they cleaved seamlessly together. 

As they were drifting off to sleep he suddenly murmured, “We might be having another soon.” 

Signy didn’t need to ask what he’d meant. The other two times, he’d known before she did. One of the advantages of being a sorcerer trained to detect the subtle stirrings of the universe. 

Five weeks later the royal physician confirmed it. Another thirty-six weeks after that, Minny literally came into the world kicking and screaming. 

She was yanked from her reminiscing when Audwin flung the library doors open and stomped in. 

“That girl is the most stubborn, thick-skulled, obstinate person I’ve ever known!” He declared. 

“Scared off another would-be swain, I see.” Signy grinned placidly. 

“ _Why_?” He spread his arms out “Why does she encourage these… these pathetic milksops?” 

“She’s hardly encouraging them.” 

“Yes she is! She _demanded_ I leave him alone and let them go on… whatever they were going on!” 

_Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree._

“Well, she knows it annoys you, and it keeps Adrian from taking her for granted.” 

“Ha! I knew… wait, _Adrian_?” 

Signy’s grin widened. “Mm-hm.” 

The only son of Honore, one of Signy’s former suitors, Adrian had been close friends with Minny since they were practically babies. Not surprisingly, that affection had turned to romantic feelings as they grew older. He was probably the only one of her admirers Audwin actually liked. 

“Wait, are you saying…?” 

“That she’s in love with him? Yes.” 

He sighed, rubbing his forehead. “So she does have good judgment after all.” 

“That she does. Now if you can stop overreacting…” 

“I don’t!”

“...And quit threatening to turn any boy that shows interest into a pig,” She playfully poked his chest, “I’m sure we’ll all be just fine.” 

“I don’t threaten _every_ boy.” He muttered. 

“Audwin, love of my life, you do too.” She gave him a light kiss. 

He sighed, looking exhausted. “Why did she have to end up so much like…” 

“Like…?” 

“... _Me_?” 

Signy laughed. “I wouldn’t change either of you for the world.” 

“Nice sentiment, but foolish.” 

She laughed again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This idea came when my pervy brain thought the makeup sex between these two would be EPIC, and that they'd probably conceive at least one kid that way. 
> 
> That, and I find the though of Audwin being an overprotective father strangely amusing. 
> 
> Menodora is a real name, I swear. There was an early saint with that name.


	6. Rabbit of Negative Euphoria

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something funny and quite silly that popped into my head the other day.   
> The chapter title is a reference to the BBC radio comedy Cabin Pressure.

It was just an ordinary afternoon in the castle when it happened. 

Signy was trying to multitask, reading a novel while munching on toasted bread and walking to her office, when she heard a scuffle and metallic clanging. 

“Quickly! Don’t lose ‘im!” 

“That way!” 

The rocket seemed to be coming from the same direction she was headed. Running the rest of the way, she turned a corner just in time to see two castle guards chase something small and black into her office. 

“He’s in the office!” 

“Shut him in! Maybe she can help us!” The guard that said this slammed the door shut. 

“What’s going on?” She asked as she caught up with them. 

“Princess! Thank goodness!” Both nodded respectfully. “A wild rabbit’s gotten into the castle somehow, and we just chased it into…” 

“I saw.” 

“You're very good with animals.” The other guard said. “We were hoping you might be able to coax it outside, if it’s not too much trouble.” 

“Not at all! Although it would go much better if you both remained out here. Poor thing’s probably scared out of its mind.” 

“Yes Ma’am. We’ll be right here if you need anything.” 

She slipped into the room carefully and quietly, expecting the rabbit to either try running past her, or go off hiding. 

To her surprise, it was standing just a few feet from the door, and at the sight of her raised itself on its haunches and immediately gave a series of desperate squeals and grunts, its ears flattened. 

“Whoa! Hey, it’s alright, little friend!” She knelt down and extended her hand for it to smell, keeping her voice low. “What happened? Did you get lost?” 

Still grunting, the rabbit jumped closer and started furiously scrabbling against her skirt with its forepaws. 

“Hey calm down, you’re okay…” The harder she tried to soothe it, the more frantic it seemed to get. 

She’d never seen a wild rabbit with such a dark coat. Even its eyes were an unusual color, some kind of purplish-red… 

The shoe dropped. 

_ Wait… It can’t be... _

“A…  _ Audwin _ ?!?” 

The immediate silence and pricking of ears was all the affirmation she needed. 

“Oh my God! What happened to you?! How did… when…?” 

“Your Highness?” One of the guards called from the other side of the door. “Everything alright?” 

“Erm… Yes. Everything’s good.” She quickly scooped him up and stood. “I’ve got him, now I just need to get him outside.” 

She walked out past the two guards and headed right to the chambers she shared with her husband. Locking the door behind her she set him down on an end table. 

“Is that really you, Audwin? I’m not just making false connections?” 

He gave a grunt. 

“Dear God, how did this happen? Who did it? I… did someone put a spell on you? Stomp once for ‘yes’ and twice for ‘no’.” 

_ *Stamp stamp*  _

“You did this to yourself?” 

_ *Stamp*  _

“And you’re stuck?” 

_ *Stamp*  _

“Dear Lord, you turned yourself into a…” The shock was starting to wear off and the hilarity of the situation was sinking in. “...into a bunny rabbit.” She started laughing. 

Audwin made it very clear he did not find it funny in the least, stamping his feet and audibly grinding his teeth. 

“Sorry… okay,” She cleared her throat. “I assume there’s some way to undo this.” 

_ *Stamp* _

“Can someone unpracticed in magic help you?” 

He turned his head to the side, which she took to mean he wasn’t sure. 

Signy thought for a moment. “Do you think we can find it in the books you’ve got here at the castle?” 

_*Stamp*_

“If not, it’s probably in your tower. If we can’t find it there, we’ll need help.” 

_ *Stamp stamp*  _

“What do you mean ‘no’? Would you rather stay this way?” 

He gave a defeated chuffing sound, which made it impossible not to smile. 

“I’m sure it won’t come to that. You’ll be back to normal in a day or two.” Unthinkingly she started scratching between his ears. He jerked away and gave her what she took to be a scolding look. 

“Sorry. Force of habit. Anyway, let’s see what I can do.” 

* * *

Apparently she could do very little, for the time being. 

They went through all the books he kept at home, only finding a few reversal spells that didn’t require someone to be experienced in using magic, but they all required either certain rare ingredients, or certain phases of the moon. 

By four in the afternoon, they were on their way to the tower, with Signy insisting on carrying Audwin the whole way much to his displeasure, lest there be some fast and hungry predators in route. 

Long after nightfall, they were still looking by candlelight, having only gotten through a third of the books and Signy’s strained eyes making the letters swim and blur together on the page. 

“Let’s face it.” She finally said with a sigh. “Unless you’re willing to wait for the next lunar eclipse, we can’t do this on our own.” 

He looked up from his place on the table. 

_*Stamp stamp*_

“Don’t be stubborn! We’ve been through maybe half the books you own, and we’re no closer than we were before! And even if we did find something, I’m too afraid I’ll mess it up! We need the sorceress to fix you, and that means telling Father and Uncle Arthur.” 

_ *STAMP STAMP*  _

“Don’t use that tone with me!” 

He gave a grunt she took to be some profanity. 

“You don’t have to like it, we’re doing it. I am  _ not _ staying married to a rabbit.” 

With that, she promptly snuffed out the candles, scooped up her disgruntled husband, and left for home. 

* * *

“...So, long story short, he’s stuck like this.” 

“So we gathered.” The Chief Minister replied dryly. 

It was very difficult to not find humor in the situation. The king and chief minister, standing in their nightclothes and dressing gowns, watching the be-spelled Prince Consort… who hadn’t eaten since breakfast… work his way through a head of cabbage and pile of green grass, occasionally pausing to give them a dirty look when it seemed like they might start laughing. 

“Never knew he could turn into a rabbit.” Edward XII commented, eye twinkling with mirth. “Not the first animal that springs to mind when I think of Audwin.” 

“Well,” The Chief Minister cleared his throat. “I figured something like this might happen sooner or later. We should definitely fix it before word gets out. I’m fairly certain everyone will take umbrage at having a rodent for a Prince consort.” 

Audwin paused to give him yet another withering look, the effect ruined somewhat by the blade of grass sticking from his mouth. 

“So it’s agreed.” The king scratched his beard. “We call the sorceress immediately.” 

“I’m afraid it’ll have to wait until morning.” His minister reminded him. “It’s near midnight, and I don’t think someone of the sorceress’ delicate health and advanced age would do well at such a late hour.” 

Audwin squealed in frustration, stamping his feet, and the king suddenly seemed to develop a small coughing fit. 

“You’re right.” Signy agreed. “We need her to be alert, and we could all use some sleep. That includes you, Audwin. You’re…” She couldn’t resist. “... Not a happy bunny.” 

He gave her the angriest look a rabbit was capable of, then ran out in a huff, leaving his dinner unfinished. 

“Too much?” 

“Perhaps a bit too soon.” The Chief Minister finally stopped fighting the grin that had been making its way to his face. 

“I hope she can help him.” She sighed. 

“I’m sure it’ll be alright, sweetheart.” Her father patted her on the shoulder. “After all, rabbit’s feet bring good luck, and he’s got two of them.” 

“They don’t bring much luck to the rabbit, though.” The Chief Minister remarked. 

* * *

Like everyone else except for Audwin himself, the aged sorceress found the whole thing quite funny. 

“Well, Your Highness,” she said to him. “I’d hoped to meet you someday, but I wasn’t expecting it to be under such… interesting circumstances. But then again, with our line of work we should expect the unexpected.” 

“I have no idea how it happened.” Signy told her. “And obviously he can’t tell me.” 

“Oh, it’s really quite common.” The older woman shrugged. “One of the hazards of practicing the magic arts, even if one is usually careful and experienced. Happens all the time.” 

“I wish he would’ve mentioned that.” Signy crossed her arms and gave her husband a stern look. 

“Maybe he doesn’t like admitting he makes mistakes.” The sorceress smirked at Audwin. “Am I right, young man?” 

He gave a faint huffing sound. 

“Just be glad you’re not stuck as something worse, like a beetle. They never would’ve found you, and you’d probably get eaten by a toad or hedgehog. Rather embarrassing end for a wizard of your caliber, eh?” 

Signy shuddered at the thought. “Embarrassing” wasn’t the word that came to mind. 

“Well, this should be easy enough.” The sorceress rubbed her hands together. “Just need to whip up the right ingredients, say the incantation, and he’ll be back to himself in no time.” 

“Good.” Signy frowned at Audwin. “After that, we’re going to have a long talk about what other hazards he hasn’t told me.” 

He just averted his gaze. 

* * *

The whole thing took only about twenty minutes. 

The sorceress mixed some dried plants with a purple powder and amber liquid that resembled whisky, then used the resulting substance to paint a circle on the floor about three feet in diameter. 

Once that was completed, she placed Audwin in the center, then began reciting the spell. The substance began to smoke, creating purple plumes of acrid mist that made Signy’s eyes and nose burn. Within a few seconds the fumes were so thick they blocked Audwin from view. 

Suddenly there was a sound… sort of like a pop or bang, but not quite, a small shockwave spreading out from the center of the circle. Following that was the sound of a man coughing. 

“It worked!” Signy cheered. 

“It did indeed.” The sorceress grinned as they waited for the smoke to dissipate, revealing Audwin crouching down in his normal form, shielding his face from the fumes.

“Thank God!” Signy ran over and hugged him while he continued to cough and clear his throat. “Welcome back!” 

“Wasn’t like I was actually gone.” He pointed out, voice a little hoarse, but there was a trace of a smile on his face. 

“It felt like you were.” She helped him to his feet. “How on Earth did it happen in the first place?” 

His glance briefly darted to the old woman watching them. “I’ll… tell you later.” 

“You’re welcome, by the way.” The sorceress gave him a pointed look, one hand planted on her hip. 

“Thank you so much!” Signy enthused, grasping the woman’s other hand. “How much do we owe you?” 

“Just one silver coin, your highness.” She turned back to Audwin. “And the promise this won’t happen again.” 

He made a face. “You think I wanted it to? I was chased by a palace cat and two inept guards, carried around like a stuffed toy, and had to endure everyone laughing at my misfortune, all without any way to speak! It was a nightmare!” 

“You poor thing.” The older magician stated sarcastically. “Maybe now you’ll come up with a contingency plan, in case something like this happens again.” 

He grumbled under his breath while Signy showed the older woman out. “Thank you again, and please don’t take his annoyance personally.” 

“I never do.” The sorceress’s eyes twinkled. “Here’s hoping the next time I see either of you, it’s to predict your children’s futures.” 

Signy flushed. “Well… um, I think he’d rather do that himself.” 

“Fair enough.” 

When Signy returned to Audwin, she crossed her arms and demanded, “You are going to tell me how this all started, Mister.” 

He sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. “There’s a jar of transformative powder among the supplies I keep at the castle. Yesterday morning, I was trying to move it and the seal broke, getting it everywhere. And before I could react I…” He squeezed his eyes shut as if the next part was painful to recall. 

“You…?” 

“... Sneezed .” 

Signy’s mouth fell open. “You _sneezed_?” 

“Yes.” 

She clapped a hand over her mouth to restrain the giggles, but they overflowed. 

“Don’t laugh!” He snapped. “Do _ not _ !” 

“Tr...trying…” It was taking every ounce of control not to burst into laughter at the images her mind conjured up: Audwin just minding his own business, spilling the powder, then suddenly sneezing and disappearing in a cloud of smoke, leaving a startled black rabbit in his place. 

He heaved a defeated sigh. “Oh fine, go ahead and get it out of your system before you burst a seam.” 

She did, so hard she couldn’t breathe. “So-sorry… you...you were… you just… then  _ poof _ !” 

“Tell nobody.” He growled. 

Still gasping, she wiped her eyes. “Oh good Lord… that’s hilarious.” 

“It’s humiliating! Of all the animals I could’ve turned into…” 

“But you were  _ adorable _ !” 

“Exactly!” 

Then he did something that put her in hysterics all over again. 

“...Please tell me I didn’t just twitch my nose.” 

She could only nod, past the ability to form coherent sentences. 

“Damn it! It’s become habit!” 

After a minute she trailed off into breathless giggles. “Well… _heh_ … she was right. You need to make a contingency plan. I think it’s about time I learned more about your line of work.” 

* * *

Audwin wasn’t the most patient of tutors, but he was persistent and confident in her ability to learn. 

Before long she knew how to reverse most simple hexes and spells, how to help him undo some bigger ones, and got a better overall understanding of how magic worked. 

And it only took him two days to stop twitching his nose.

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good news! I've finally gotten a perfect score on 1-12, and also on 1-14!   
> I'm probably going to try finishing the game and all three endings before writing anything else, so the next update won't be for a while peeps.   
> Happy Thanksgiving!


	7. Professors Krohn and Vogel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That crossover with other dutp books I promised.   
> A modern day college professor au.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good news is I've finally reached chapter 1-17 of Swan Lake. The bad news is, the damn app keeps crashing when I reach the outfit change. I'm guessing it's because my phone's a little too old, so I'll have to wait until I get a new phone for Christmas. In the meantime...

“Sooo, what’s the deal with Tall, Dark, and Sarcastic?”

Signy’s ears pricked at Elizabeth’s tone, fork halting midway to her mouth. “Huh?”

Her friend and fellow faculty member had her chin propped in her hand, grinning. “I’m pretty sure he fancies you, as the Brits would say.”

Signy Krohn was a grown woman. She was too old to blush at the mere mention of a guy.

Especially a guy who resembled a goth high-schooler’s idea of a hot teacher.

And yet… and yet…

“There’s no deal, or whatever.” She said dismissively, proud of herself for keeping a disinterested tone.

“So you’re not denying he’s got a thing for you?”

“How should I know?”

Gina smiled beside her. “Well, the fact he seems to always be looking for reasons to interact with you, for one thing. And likes to ruffle your feathers more than anyone else’s. Typical behavior of a total ass who’s got a crush.”

“Alright, so what if he does? Doesn’t mean I have to do anything about it.” Signy took a bite of her pasta salad.

“You’re right, it doesn’t.” Elizabeth smiled sweetly. “As long as you don’t feel the same.”

“I _don’t_.” Signy replied, maybe a little too quickly and with a touch more emphasis than necessary.

Gina chuckled. “You know what he looks like to me? The lovechild of Loki and Bowie’s character from _Labyrinth_.”

“Jareth.” Signy corrected automatically, like anyone would after hearing incorrect or incomplete information regarding one of their favorite movies.

“My God, you’re right!” Elizabeth laughed “Why didn’t I notice that?”

A better question was, why hadn’t Signy?

God help her, now she was doubly screwed. 

* * *

Dr. Audwin Vogel, Saint Isabelle University’s new chemistry professor, had been on campus for only two semesters now. Already he was creating ripples.

The first and most immediate thing that stood out was his appearance. The man was quite lanky, but not in a way that was awkward or clumsy (on the contrary, something about him always reminded Signy of a bird or cat) and dressed his tall frame in mostly black all year around.

There was also the fact that, as anybody who noticed this kind of thing would admit, he was pretty handsome, in a thin, sharp kind of way.

Unfortunately, anyone drawn in by his looks was immediately chased away by his blunt and caustic way of speaking.

From the very get-go, he’d made it clear how much he distained social conventions and niceties. During first first few months he’d kept interaction with his coworkers to a bare minimum, only occasionally breaking in with cutting sarcastic comments, barbed remarks, and seemed to relish pushing the envelope when it came to annoying those around him.

In other words, not exactly friendly.

Though he had almost softened in a way, spending more and more time with associates outside of faculty meetings he couldn’t weasel out of, his presence was hard to tolerate if you were easily riled up.

Signy didn’t consider herself that easy to rile up. But from the beginning the things he said and the way he said them had a way of getting under her skin, a fact he seemed to find very entertaining.

For one thing, he often teased her about the fact she mostly taught Dance Theory, “What _is_ that? Is it even real dancing? What is there to theorize about? It’s _dancing_ , for God’s sake.”

She’d tried not to react the way he hoped for. Tried and failed. He always managed to get a rise out of her, and the conversation would end with her sniping and leaving in a flustered huff.

But if Signy was being completely honest with herself, Gina and Lizzie’s theory that this was all the verbal equivalent of a third-grader pulling his crush’s pigtails seemed plausible. She seemed to be at the receiving end more often than their other coworkers, even the incredibly serious and somewhat uptight Dean of History, Gilbert duMortier, wasn’t nearly as favored a target as one would think.

It wasn’t anything really bad. Nothing that resembled harassment or actual bullying. It was just… irksome.

For the longest time, she told herself that was why she couldn’t ignore him. That he somehow knew how to find the right nerve. It had nothing to do with how she sometimes found him darkly funny, or his languid Devil-may-care manner, or that mischievous sparkle in his eye when he spoke to her, along with the matching smile…

After a while she was willing to admit to herself that she might _possibly_ find him attractive. Her theory being that the ‘Liking a Bad Boy’ phase she’d managed to skip during her teens had finally caught up with her.

Now, she wasn’t so confident in this theory.

As annoying as he could be, she found herself enjoying his company and their bantering, even if the latter turned into bickering more often than not. She felt like he challenged her, in a manner of speaking, stretching her more witty, irreverent side.

The feelings being mutual sort of threw a wrench in the works.

For one thing, Signy wasn’t sure if she was interested in pursuing an actual relationship with him. He didn’t strike her as someone who even _did_ serious relationships.

She tried reminding herself that they had little in common, except they actually did have a surprising amount of things in common, like a love of classical music, nature, animals, German Romanticism literature, and being the only people on the face of the earth who’d seen _Lost_ and didn’t like it. And that was just the first things that came to mind.

When reminding her of these, her brain, for whatever reason, also felt the need to remind her of examples that he had a softer, more human side. Like the strange contraption she’d seen him install right outside his office window, that after persistent questioning he’d revealed to be a puzzle box specifically designed for the ravens and crows on campus.

To entertain themselves.

Yes, he was that kind of person.

It was not helping her like him any less.

And if her friends could see it, then it was only a matter of time before he did. What he’d do with that information, she had no idea. But she didn’t think she wanted to find out. 

* * *

She returned to the campus dance studio, still flustered over the conversation at lunch and trying to focus on the upcoming class.

Then You-Know-Who swooped in.

“What’s in today’s lessons on ‘Dance Theory’?” He asked with that usual vexing smile of his.

“Those are Tuesdays and Thursdays, remember?” Signy grinned, feeling a bit of petty satisfaction at his tiny error. “Mondays and Wednesdays are regular ballet.”

He shrugged. “Okay. What’s in today’s lessons on ballet? The pirouette? The fourth position, whatever the hell that is?”

“Those were weeks ago.” She smiled sweetly. “I’d tell you what we’re going over now, but it would probably fly over your head.”

“Maybe not. You’re always saying I’ve got a big head to begin with.”

“And what’s in today’s lesson of the highly important and superior realm of biochemistry?”

He frowned. “We’re just reviewing some things, which will basically just show how much they’ve forgotten in such a short time.”

“How much is that?”

“If I had ten dollars for every time a student said ‘we’ve never gone over this before!’ I could be retired by now.” He said with a martyred sigh.

Signy shrugged. “I guess it’s one of the things that comes with teaching a requisite course rather than an elective one.”

He glowered at her. “You just love rubbing my nose in that, don’t you?”

“I’m just saying, there’s something nice about knowing all your students actually want to be there…”

“But you will probably never experience the joy of cutting an entitled trust-fund brat down to size.”

By now they’d reached the studio. Signy unlocked the doors and turned on all the lights, with Professor Vogel following her inside.

“I’m afraid to ask.” She muttered as she removed the jacket and sweatpants she had over her leotard and tights.

“One student threatened that her father would get me fired somehow if I didn’t raise her grade. So I raised it… from a 50% to a 55%.”

Signy bit the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing, and tried to distract herself with stretches. “I’ll admit, that’s pretty clever.”

He looked off in the distance with a devilish smile. “Whenever I’m having a bad day, I just think of the look on her face, and my mood’s lifted.”

“Sadist.” She muttered, still stretching. 

“Don’t act like your nightmare students don’t bring out the worst in you.” He leaned against the wall, watching their reflections in the mirrors across the room. “Someone who thinks you don’t appreciate their amazing talent, when in reality they dance like an ostrich?”

This time the laugh escaped her mouth, and she tried to cover it up with a cough. Unsuccessfully, judging by the satisfied smirk on his face.

“Yeah, I’ve had my share of those. I’ve had more than a few tell me how I should be doing my job, a couple burst into tears because they couldn’t take criticism of any kind, no matter how gently it’s delivered, and over a dozen who kept missing classes and then got upset when I dropped them.”

She stood up and looked him right in the eye. “But I don’t get petty about it.”

He scoffed. “What I did wasn’t petty, it was malicious compliance. Hopefully it taught that woman a lesson, but I wouldn’t bet on it.”

This time he gave her _that_ smile, the one that made her knees weak (which she did not need right before class).

“But let’s be honest, Professor Krohn, we both know you’re not as perfectly sweet as you claim to be. You’ve got a vicious streak a mile wide, and God help the poor bastard who crosses the line with you.”

She blinked. Something told her that was neither a compliment, insult, nor observation, but somehow all of the above.

Suddenly one of her students came in, freezing when he saw the Cutthroat Chemistry Professor® loitering about like a buzzard. “Uhh… am I too early?”

“Not at all, Rob!” Signy grinned at him. “Come in.”

The young man kept looking back and forth between them with a thoughtful expression. Professor Vogel just frowned, as if the kid had interrupted something.

“Sorry to cut this short,” Signy said, “But class is starting in about half an hour.”

“Fine.” He walked to the doors. “Back to the theorizing about dance.”

“I told you, it’s ballet today!” She said sharply.

“Whatever.” He muttered as the doors shut behind him.

Signy realized the student was still looking at her.

“Is it true he’s got some kind of puzzle for birds hanging outside his office window?” He asked.

“It’s for crows.” 

“Weird, but kinda’ cool.”

“I guess…”

“He seems pretty nice to you, at least.”

Heat flooded her face. _Who asked you?!_

* * *

Finally, in the end she decided that if Audwin Vogel was going to know about her attraction to him anyway, she might as well make it happen on her own terms. Ideally by taking the initiative and inviting him out somewhere.

Everything else, she’d plan as she went along.

So about a week after their conversation, she decided to put on her big girl undies and ask him out to coffee like the adult she was. And if he declined, she wouldn’t let it bother her. His loss and all that.

She waited until the end of his final lecture for the day, staying in the hallway as his students spilled out of the lecture hall, most of them looking either relieved to be finished, or shell-shocked. A couple recognized Signy and exchanged hellos. Once the she was confident there were no remaining stragglers, she entered the classroom.

He was putting some things away at his desk, looking about as tired as his students.

“Good afternoon, Professor.”

He actually looked startled for a moment, but quickly recovered. “What are _you_ doing here?” He asked bluntly.

She rolled her eyes. “I wanted to talk to you about something. Is that allowed?”

“You’ve never been in here.” He pointed out, as if that was an answer in itself.

“First time for everything.”

“It’ll have to wait until I’m done here.”

“That’s fine. Take your time.”

As he continued putting things in folders and putting those folders in his bag, she suddenly noticed a student was still there way in the back, head resting on top of his open textbook.

“Um, I think you’ve got a sleeper.”

He sighed, not even bothering to look up. “Let me guess: male, Caucasian, blond, looks terminally incapable of growing facial hair.”

“I guess.”

The look on his face suggested this was not a first-time offence.

Professor Vogel marched over to the student in question, grabbed the edge of the textbook and sharply yanked it out from under him, effectively jerking the young man awake.

“Hng! Wha…?”

“Class is over.” The professor barked. “Scram, so I can go home already.”

“Oh sh… Uh, I mean… yessir.” The poor kid started fumbling with his things and trying to cram them all into his backpack while Professor Vogel watched impatiently.

The young man practically ran down the steps, stumbling when he finally noticed Signy.

“Oh! Er… ah… hi?” He turned red.

“Hello.” She gave him a polite smile.

“For God’s sake, will you just _go_ already?” Professor Vogel growled

The student launched himself out of the lecture hall, trailing some loose pages of notebook paper behind him.

“Idiot.” Professor Vogel grumbled. “See what I put up with every day?”

Signy rolled her eyes and shook her head. “Don’t you remember what it was like being their age?”

“Yes. I had it worse than they did.”

“Never mind, then.” 

She waited until they were out of the lecture hall and he started locking up, then cleared her throat to speak.

But he spoke before she could make a sound.

“You wouldn’t want to go for some coffee, would you?”

A shocked, strangled sound began and died in her throat.

He frowned. “You could’ve just said ‘no’.”

“You… you… jerk!” She snapped. “I was supposed to ask you that!”

“Says who?” He demanded.

“Says me! That was my preemptive strike, and you just had to swoop in and be all…” She waved vaguely at him. “Mister Has the First and Last Word!”

He looked completely baffled by now. “What the hell are you saying, and in what language?”

“You weren’t supposed to make the first move! I was making the first move! You could at least let me have that!”

“I’m not even going to pretend I know what you’re talking about.” He grumbled. “But if you’re going to get your shorts in a twist, then we can do it all over again.”

“It’s too late!”

He groaned. “Ugh, for the love of…Do you or don’t you want the damn coffee?”

“I do! But I’m still mad!”

“Just fine with me.”

She suddenly realized to her mortification that several students had stopped whatever they were doing to watch the drama play itself out.

“If any of you are recording this, I’ll hunt you down.” Professor Vogel threatened darkly, prompting them to either go about their business or scurry away.

Signy was wishing the earth would swallow her whole.

“So, Friday at two, then?” The man beside her continued.

“That’s fine.” She mumbled, reminding herself that she was a _grown woman dang it quit blushing!_

He paused to look at her, something almost soft flitting through his face. “Were you really going to ask me just now?”

“Yes.” She sighed. “And I was so proud of myself.”

The corners of his mouth twitched. “Can I ask why?”

She was already embarrassed, Signy figured she had nothing to lose.

“Why? Because you drive me crazy, you’re rude and prickly and arrogant, and you always manage find out exactly how to get a rise out of me. But in spite all of that, I find you stupidly attractive, funny, and interesting. I feel like I’m a little more myself than I have been in a really long time, because you coax those traits out of me and appreciate them.”

His face had gone blank. Whether from shock or because he was thinking, she couldn’t really tell. 

“You’re also no idiot,” Signy continued, “So I figured it was only a matter of time before you figured it all out for yourself, and I decided I’d rather you heard it from my own lips.”

She waited to feel embarrassment or regret for laying it all out in the open for him to see. But she didn’t.

On the contrary, she felt pretty damn good, whatever his response might be.

That spark of mischief returned to his face. “You think I’m stupidly attractive?”

Seriously? That was what he decided to focus on?

Signy gave him a smirk of her own. “More attractive than Tom Hiddleston and young David Bowie… combined.”

And she walked off, leaving him looking very confused.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You cannot convince me that Loki and Jareth were not major inspirations for Audwin's character and design.  
> Hope the banter and bickering was in character.   
> "Vogel" Is a German surname meaning "bird", and "Krohn" Is a Danish surname meaning "crown". because I'm sure you were all dying to know.


	8. Wish that You were Here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three years after the ending "The Queen Reigns", he writes her a letter...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My phone cooperated and now I finished the book at last! MAJOR SPOILERS!
> 
> I think this ending was objectively the best of the three, but it's incredibly sad and bittersweet.  
> Get the tissues ready. 
> 
> (Originally this Chap had a different name, but then I realized how much it reminds me of the Florence and the Machine song by the same name, which I recommend listening to during, before, or after reading)

He glared down at the paper and sighed, taunted by its blank surface.

One would think, after three years, it would be easier than this.

Well, it _was_ a little easier than at the beginning, when he was unused to writing letters to anyone at all. But to this day, Audwin still struggled with figuring out what to write to his dearest friend.

_Dear Signy…weather’s been nice. Health has been good. Missing you like hell._

He groaned, leaning back in his chair and rubbing a hand over his face.

There were plenty of things he wanted to say, but even he knew very little of it was appropriate for a letter to a friend. Even a very good friend. Once again proving that, for all the flowery words and ink spilled over the subject, falling in love was utter hell.

True, he’d lived through far worse. But it still stung.

So, at least once a month, usually more, he found himself navigating through these _feelings…_ as he tried to come up with a letter to the woman responsible for all this. 

_...I think about you every day, and I feel like a fool._

Why?

His life was happier than he’d ever thought possible. The fragile bond with his sibling grew stronger with each passing day. 

_...I can’t walk past a blasted squirrel or rabbit without thinking of what silly names you’d come up for them._

Moreover, he’d found uses for his training and skills in the magic arts, using them to help people and even bring them a bit of happiness.

Audwin’s mind drifted to a few weeks ago when Aldous decided he should put those abilities to good use at an orphanage, essentially dragging him there and brushing off his brother’s protests.

“I can’t stand children!”

“How do you know? You’ve never even been around any!”

“If I told you I’ve never swam, would you throw me into the middle of a lake?! They’ll hate me!”

“You do magic. Kids love magic. You’ll be a hit.”

He was right, damn him.

The brothers’ reputations had clearly preceded them. As soon as the children knew who Audwin was, they were falling over themselves trying to get closer and ask questions faster than he could answer.

“How did you learn to do all that?”

“Can you make me taller?”

“Why do you turn into an owl?”

“Can you do card tricks?”

“Why’d you turn your brother into a swan instead of something gross, like a snake?”

_…Believe it or not, I’ve just learned I don’t dislike children. True, they can be annoying, but they can also be creative and open-minded in a way adults can’t even aspire to._

_… Foolishly, I find myself wondering what ours might’ve looked like._

The two of them were seeing a lot of the world, more than Audwin ever thought he would, even in his most hopeful, delusional imaginings as a child. France, England, Morocco, India, Egypt, China, and Persia… in just three short years, he’d been to at least one country out of three continents. They had yet to visit the Americas, but tentatively planned to do so at some as of yet unspecified date.

It was beyond description, all the different sights, sounds, and smells. Meeting people from so many nations and tribes, hearing their languages and tasting their food, seeing the countless different plants and animals that he’d only heard of in books, seeing just how enormous the world truly was…

He loved it.

But through it all, he was still missing her.

_… I was trying so hard to remember all the names of the tribes, words from their languages, every plant and animal I came across, just so I could properly write to you about them. I kept saying to myself, “If only Signy could see this.”_

In the meanwhile, the book Aldous had written containing his memoirs, but published as fiction with some sensitive details either changed or omitted, had been circulating the world. And the story was a smashing success.

Many readers, philosophers, and scholars had discussed and debated its possible meanings. Was it an allegory? A modern folktale? A parable?

Why did the Princess not choose either brother? Was it a symbol of old regimes falling and the growing rights and freedoms of modern women?

And what about this cursed connection between the twin brothers? Surely that was a metaphor describing the paradoxical duality of modern Western society.

And these were just a few of the many things he’d heard from commentators and critics. He wasn’t sure his brain could withstand the full volume of theories attributed to his twin’s autobiography.

A few weeks ago, the two of them had received an official invitation to visit the Russian court and meet the imperial family. Not only that, apparently an esteemed composer from the Russian Musical Society was wanting to discuss a ballet inspired by Aldous’s book, with his permission of course.

_…It looks like we might be going to Russia. I’m looking forward to it, and at the same time a little terrified, if I’m being honest. The place is huge, and there will undoubtedly be hundreds of nobles we’ll be expected to pander to and hobnob with. I just know your presence would’ve made it a hundred times more enjoyable._

They had already met many royals and nobles in their travels, including a large portion of the British royal family. Queen Victoria herself had taken quite a liking to them. Her youngest daughter suggested it might have been because Aldous reminded the old woman of her deceased husband as a young man, while Audwin’s quirky sauciness was a refreshing change from the stuffy English nobility.

_… We’ve managed to charm the Queen of Great Britain. Though her pictures make her seem dour, she’s actually quite pleasant. She asked lot about you, and thinks you’ve done a great job so far, which has further raised her in my esteem._

Yet, through all their journeys, the brothers both wondered: would there ever be a place they could really call home?

They’d tried multiple times to visit what used to be their kingdom, now divided and absorbed into the surrounding countries, but it was easier said than done.

Aldous was technically king of the defunct nation, and Audwin currently next in line. Having them around their former subjects ran too many risks, as far as the leaders of the other countries were concerned. The Princes were a perfect banner for counter-revolutionaries to rally behind, whether said princes liked it or not.

They’d known it would be difficult. But what could they do in the meantime?

They’d met exiles, refugees, and expatriates among their former countrymen who’d given suggestions, and even opened their own homes to them.

Some had accepted Audwin with great reluctance, only out of courtesy for Aldous, making it clear they strongly doubted the legitimacy of his claims. But a surprising number acknowledged him as the second son of their former monarchs, mostly people who’d known their parents very well.

_… I’ve been learning more and more about our parents._

_I’m having very mixed emotions about all this. I actually find myself pitying them. Again, I wish you were here, because I feel like you could help me make sense of these feelings._

He was pathetic.

All these things happening to him, all these events and plan filling his thoughts and keeping him preoccupied.

But he kept thinking of her.

_...Is it depraved that I keep wondering what it’d be like to kiss you? To hold your hand?_

No one had told him how painful it was to let go of someone you love.

It was Signy’s choice, and had been a difficult one for her to make. Audwin didn’t begrudge her for it. She believed it was the best for everyone, and it probably truly was. It was nobody’s fault that circumstances had prevented them from seeing her in person since her coronation three years ago.

At least the two brothers wouldn’t be facing it alone. He knew Aldous missed her at least as much as he did, though they never discussed it aloud.

It was the damnedest thing for them to bond over, but there it was.

Audwin hoped that Signy at least took comfort in knowing she’d found her place in the world, and was fulfilling it magnificently.

In the meantime, how to write this damned letter?

He studied the paper again.

There was quite a lot of stationary for him to use here at the Royal Hotel of Krakow, maybe…

He dipped his pen in the inkwell again, set it to the paper, and just let the words flow out.

Just getting his thoughts on paper with no care to how they sounded and breaking through his mental block, as Aldous had done when writing the first draft of his book.

Three years of suppressed emotions spread onto the pages, words he could never say aloud even to himself, thoughts he’d tried to keep tampered down for his own sanity. It was all there.

He didn’t even read it. Just pressed the ink blotter to it and folded it up before grabbing more sheets of stationary and writing the real letter.

It was much easier now. He simply trimmed away the words and thoughts that were too personal, too intimate, but kept the events and his initial thoughts on them all. The ones that didn’t involve pining.

When he finished, he reviewed it and found it to his satisfaction.

Friendly, not too stiff or formal, but not too personal either.

_Krakow, Poland_

_Hotel Royal_

_Dear Signy,_

_First of all, my brother’s being a well-meaning pain in the neck. But what else is new? I’m actually enjoying Poland. The weather’s been pleasant, and the woods are full of those insipid animals you love so much. Seeing them makes you feel a little closer, if that makes sense._

_You might’ve already heard of the orphanage from Aldous’s letter, but here’s what really happened: he dragged me there, told the kiddies I was a sorcerer, then stood by and did nothing as I was swarmed by curious moppets. _

_Oddly enough, the experience helped me realize I don’t actually dislike children. Maybe I just thought I did on principle, as they struck me as something an evil sorcerer would hate._

_I don’t have to see you to know you’re rolling your eyes right now._

_In reality, though they can be annoying and even ruthless, they’re also amazingly creative and open-minded in ways adults can’t even aspire to. Some of them are so innocent, it breaks your heart._

_At the risk of sounding maudlin, I find myself wondering if I’d ever want to have any of my own, someday._

_On a different note, have you heard some of the things being said about my brother’s “Modern day folktale”? Or is it a parable? It’s ridiculous how much philosophical meaning the educated elite is attaching to this book. But then again, I suppose it has no other meaning unless you know it’s a true account rather than fiction._

_One nice thing about it, it appears the growing Suffragette movement and their allies are considering your character as a symbol to rally behind. I applaud them, and hope for their success. Both you and your fictional counterpart shall be inspirations for future women to fight for their freedom, and I say that’s no small feat._

_It looks like we might be going to Russia soon. As Aldous has probably mentioned, some well-known composer, whose name you might recognize but I won’t even try to spell, has read his book and would like to discuss using it as inspiration for a ballet. Why a ballet, I have no idea. Personally I think an ordinary play would do it better justice, but nobody asked me._

_I’m actually looking forward to going, yet at the same time a little daunted. The place is HUGE, no two ways about it. And God help me, all those nobles we’ll be introduced to… all the Alexander’s, Nicholai’s, Maria’s, and Theodora’s… how can I possibly keep track of them all? I just know I’ll bungle things early on and earn their distain._

_Well, see if I give a rip. I’ve got a queen and suffragette symbol on my side, so there! _

_Joking aside, things in the Russian empire are looking shaky to say the least. You’ve probably heard how the last Tsar died. I hope they learn from our parents’ mistakes, and avoid the same fate. In the meanwhile, Aldous and I will probably be looking over our shoulders the whole time._

_Maybe I should move on to more cheerful matters. You’re probably dying to hear my impression of Her Majesty the Queen of England._

_Vic’s a grand old gal, not nearly as dour as her photographs make her look and very entertaining. She asked us a lot of questions about you, and seems to think you’re doing a magnificent job so far. Clearly a great judge of character._

_HRH Princess Beatrice claimed that we’ve managed to charm her completely, owing to Aldous sharing a similar personality with the late Prince Albert, and my own less conventional personality catering to Her Majesty’s whimsy._

_You’d like visiting her, I think. Just steer clear of the Prince of Wales. His reputation as a rake is well earned._

_Well, I think that covers everything. I’ll write to you again from Saint Petersburg, assuming I can find the time with all the hobnobbing with Russian nobles and such. Don’t envy me, just pray I’ll have the strength to endure._

_-Audwin._

Blotting the ink, he put it in the envelope and sealed it shut with wax. Setting it aside, he picked up the first letter with the intention of throwing it away, or even burning it.

Having it fall into the wrong hands could be dangerous as well as humiliating. God knew what bastards lurked about who were itching for something to use against either one of them.

Yet he couldn’t bring himself to destroy it.

It was his cold, shriveled heart laid bare. Throwing out the letter would feel like removing a little part of himself. A ridiculous sentiment, but a tenacious one.

After thinking it over, he folded it carefully, sealing it in another envelope that he left unaddressed, and placing it deep among his most personal belongings.

Later he’d decide what to do with it. 

* * *

_(53 Years later)_

Signy examined the package, running her finger over the edges and corners, over the seams, as if it would make it more real in her mind.

She’d waited two years for it, and had all but given up hope of receiving it, considering herself fortunate to just be alive at her advanced age and after the horrors of two great wars rattling through the world, with Europe as the center stage.

She’d thought the death of her two dear friends would’ve taken more years from her own life.

Signy could remember clearly every detail of the telephone call from Aldous’s wife, now widow, bearing the heavy message.

Audwin had gone first, followed by Aldous, the mystical bond between the twins pulling them both from this world within the same minute.

At least it had been peaceful, side by side, surrounded by loved ones. Between the two of them they left behind one widow, eight children, twenty-four grandchildren, and currently seven great-grandchildren.

Signy still couldn’t believe they were gone.

She had exchanged so many letters, photographs, and even phone calls with them over the decades that she sometimes forgot it had been fifty-six years since she last saw them in person. They’d watched each other slowly grow older, marry, have children, and watched those children grow up to have their own children, all while many miles apart.

Now, this was what they’d left her.

The solicitor’s neat handwriting was easy to read once she put on her spectacles, explaining that the package contained some personal papers and effects willed to her by the two brothers prior to their passing.

It was with mixed emotions that she carefully unwrapped the package and extracted its contents.

Most of it was mundane wavers and paperwork, some of it was photographs that they probably hadn’t gotten around to sending her during their lifetime. 

Then she noticed an envelope with Audwin’s handwriting on it.

It looked very old, like he’d sealed it many decades ago and put it in a dark place. The wax was crumbling and almost completely gone at this point.

On it was written a simple note. The spidery scrawl was more consistent with his handwriting in the last few years of his life, as his eyesight dimmed and his hands became less steady.

_I once wondered what I’d do with this. Could never bring myself to get rid of it. It always felt like a piece of myself that I’d somehow gotten on a sheet of paper._

_After thinking it over carefully, I decided it belonged to you. I’m sorry in advance for whatever reaction it may create._

_-Au._

The corners of her mouth pulled into a smile.

This ought to be interesting.

Carefully, mindful of the letter’s age, she opened the envelope and pulled out the paper inside. Unfolding it revealed stationary from the Hotel Royal Krakow.

Why did that sound familiar?

Oh now she remembered, that was where they’d stayed right before traveling to Russia to talk with Tchaikovsky about the ballet.

Signy laughed to herself.

The gifted conductor had taken several liberties with the material, which had left her and Aldous rather bemused and Audwin throwing a conniption that was just as funny now as it had been fifty years ago.

_What the devil is going on here?! You’re a man! Aldous is a woman! I’m two different people and one of them is also a woman! As if that wasn’t enough, they have you both committing lover’s suicide at the end! What is this, Romeo and Juliette? The man is an idiot! Didn’t I say a play would’ve been much better? But no, nobody wants MY opinion…!_

But even he had to admit one good thing had come of it.

Because it was while reluctantly attending a performance that he’d met his future wife, an amazing woman named Clara whose brother was playing second cello in the orchestra.

Signy was grateful beyond words that both brothers had found love, and mourned along with them when Clara died five years ago, after more than forty happy years married to the man once known as the Owl Sorcerer.

Blast it, she was already getting choked up, and she hadn’t even read the…

Well, she didn’t know what it was. A letter? Why would he write her a letter and keep it for so long before sending it?

A quick glance showed that the writing was rather hurried and sloppy with more than a few mistakes, misspellings, and things crossed out.

Well, there was nothing for it. She needed to read this thing.

_Dear Signy,_

_What is wrong with me?_

_Everything in my life is going wonderfully. I’m growing to love the twin I once hated, people are interested in hearing about me and learning my story. I have seen many wonders of the known world and will probably see many more._

_So why do I still feel like a part of me has been cut out?_

_Why do my thoughts keep circling back to the woman I said goodbye to?_

_Why do I still miss you like hell?_

_Like a lovesick fool, I think about you every day. I can’t walk past a blasted squirrel or rabbit without wondering what silly name you might give it. When we see something new, learn about a tribe or people group, see an animal or plant I’ve only heard of in books, I try to keep it all in my memories for the sole purpose of telling you about them later. I keep saying to myself, “If only Signy could see this.”_

_Aldous made me accompany him on a visit to an orphanage, where I learned that I don’t actually dislike children as I once thought. Yes, they can be annoying and even ruthless, but they can also be creative and open-minded in ways adults can’t even aspire to. And they can be so innocent, it breaks your heart._

_I actually find myself thinking I wouldn’t be averse to having any of my own someday. But what bothers me is that I wonder what ours would’ve been like._

_Sounds disgusting, right? Utterly depraved?_

_Is it also depraved that I keep wondering what it would be like to kiss you? To hold your hand?_

_I know it’s wrong, and I’d never do anything that might hurt or upset you. But my mind wanders, and I can’t stop it._

_We might be going to Russia soon, as Aldous probably mentioned in his own letter. I’m looking forward to it, yet at the same time a little terrified. The place is huge, and God knows how many nobles, dignitaries, and Imperial family members we’ll be meeting. Aldous was trained for this his whole life, while I once again find myself lacking. How the hell can I keep track of them all?_

_I wish you were coming with us. In private you and I would laugh together at the more uptight and arrogant Russian nobles, and Aldous would scold at us like the mother hen he is. But once you faced them, you’d charm them all, I just know it._

_The inner turmoil Russia is facing certainly isn’t helping us feel at ease. The last Tsar was assassinated by his own subjects, and the imperial family lives in complete paranoia, holding the populace at arm’s length under iron shackles._

_It looks an awful lot like what happened with our kingdom, and it’s like watching a train derail slowly. Why haven’t they learned from our parents’ mistakes?_

_Our parents. I’ve been learning more about them. Part of me doesn’t want to, but part of me needs to know these people who brought me into the world and then locked me away against their better judgment._

_Many loyal former subjects are willing to believe I’m who I claim to be on no more proof than my resemblance to our mother, their knowledge of their characters, and the fact that Aldous himself believes me._

_From what I can gather, it seems they were loving and well-meaning, but not really equipped to lead a country in such dire straits as the one they inherited._

_I’m having very mixed emotions about all this. Still haven’t forgiven them, and probably never will, but I actually find myself pitying them._

_Again, I wish you were here, because I feel like you could help me make sense of these feelings._

_Again, I go back to missing you. What’s wrong with me?_

_I even thought of you when we visited the Queen of England. She’s actually a very pleasant lady, not nearly as dour as her photographs make her look. She kept asking us about you, saying you were doing a marvelous job so far._

_I think you’d love visiting her, but not so much the Prince of Wales. You’ve heard about his weakness for beautiful women. He’d be drooling over you the whole time like an Irish wolfhound over a prime cut of steak. You could handle yourself just fine, I’m sure, but I’d still probably do something stupid out of jealousy and overprotectiveness, and alienate your kingdom from the British Empire._

_Dear God, I’m pathetic._

_It’s been three years, but it hardly feels like I miss you any less. Is this normal?_

_I sometimes worry that I have an unhealthy fixation. I don’t think of you every single minute, but you’re still rarely far from my thoughts._

_Don’t mistake me, I’m very glad you’re happy and doing so well. I feel proud whenever people say your praises and show the admiration you deserve. I just wish I was there with you through it all._

_Maybe someday I’ll move on. Maybe even fall in love again. But right now, it certainly doesn’t feel like I ever will. How do you forget greatness?_

_No wonder people make such a fuss over heartbreak. It’s enough to drive a person insane. What’s worse is that I can’t talk about this to anyone. I know Aldous would understand, and probably already knows, but this has been a taboo subject with us. We know it’s there, and comfort each other, but we don’t name it._

_Don’t worry, I still have my head firmly on my shoulders, such as it is, and I have no plans to do anything desperate like kill myself or write a godawful poem about my agony._

_Just writing this is already making me feel better. I’m not even truly sure why I’m doing it, but I’m glad I did._

_I will always miss you, I’ll always love you, but more importantly, I’ll always want you to be happy._

_-Audwin._

Tears were streaming down her face, a choked sob leaving her throat.

Several times, she’d had to stop and compose herself in order to keep reading.

Finally, Signy put it aside and let it all out, weeping into her hands.

After several long minutes, she was able to look at the letter again, expecting to feel the pangs of sadness again.

Instead, she felt a strange calm.

He had indeed moved on, and found happiness. They all had. He wouldn’t know it as he was putting his emotions to paper, but he would one day fall in love again, and start afresh. 

He and Clara had been truly happy. Of this Signy had no doubt. Whether or not the other woman ever knew that Queen Signy had been his first love, she had no idea. But that didn’t matter.

she felt honored he'd trusted her with something so personal, so dangerous as this. A glimpse into the man that even his twin and wife might not have seen.

With a tearful smile, she carefully folded the letter again and placed it in the package with the full intention of putting it in a safe place once the opportunity arose. 

* * *

_Dear Audwin,_

_I understand more than you can possibly imagine._

_I still don’t regret my decision. I’m know in my heart it was the best for everyone. But it still hurts to know how much pain it caused you._

_For years I tried to tell myself you’d felt nothing but a passing infatuation. You were so new to forming bonds with people, how could you know what it meant to love someone? Even I wasn’t sure I knew what love meant._

_I see now that I was wrong. I also see that I lied to myself because I was going through the same hell as you._

_I also missed you like mad. I also wished you were there with me, or I was there with you two. I also tried harder to remember things just so I could write to you about them._

_I also wondered often what kissing you would be like. And what kind of children we’d have. I also felt like a part of me was carved out when we said goodbye._

_I was truly happy when you fell in love and married such a great woman, had a family of your own, yet at the same time a part of me was hurting and wishing it could’ve been me._

_Yet, I strongly feel your life was far happier as you experienced it than if you’d stayed with me. You would’ve been miserable, like a bird in a cage, uncomfortable with all the duties and expectations thrust upon you as the Queen's husband. This way, you were free to do as you wished._

_My own life has been a good, full one. And thus, I can’t say I have any true regrets on that front._

_But a part of me will always still wonder._

_Now, you’re free of all pain and sorrow. Before long, I will join you both, as well everyone else we've lost over the years. I'm in no great hurry, but am looking forward to it._

_Until then, my love._

_-Signy._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like to think that the two brothers still find happiness afterwards, even if they and Signy never stop missing each other. 
> 
> Sort of fudging with history, because the first version of Swan Lake was first performed in 1877, but a revival and revision was made in 1895, and that's the version performed today. I'm imagining in this universe the second version was the only one, and Tchaikovsky was inspired by Aldous's memoirs, because the game strikes me as taking place in the late 19th century.


	9. St. Isabelle U. Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A rather fluffy, Christmassy sequel to chapter 7, but could be a stand-alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, to make up for the tear-jerker that was last chapter, here's a happy fluffy one, with more interaction with other dutp characters (especially Charlotte Harris).

_So there IS a God. And he loves to torment me._

That was the second coherent thought in Audwin’s head.

The first, following a fuzzy blankness he’d once thought unachievable outside a coma, was _Why the hell does she have to look so amazing?_

Professor Signy Krohn, Saint Isabella University’s dance instructor, Audwin’s coworker, friend, and current infatuation, was attending the Capets’ Christmas party, wearing a little black dress that made her look so stunning and classy that Audrey Hepburn in her prime seemed dull in comparison.

Of all the single, attractive faculty members, why was she the one to turn his head? Why did this infuriating, fascinating woman make his stupid heart race like a twelve-year-old getting his first crush?

He’d been asking himself this for months now. Pretty much since the beginning he’d enjoyed teasing and bantering with Signy more than the others on campus. As time wore on, he’d begun to realize he was developing an attraction to the other professor. And while he wasn’t good at reading people that well, he’d been picking up some signals from the woman implying it went both ways.

When his meddling idiot of a brother managed to drag all this information out of him, he hounded Audwin for _weeks_ to do something about it.

So he finally did.

In the present, Signy was laughing at something Professor Fersen said, leaning against Professor Colvin for support while the other woman just shook her head.

Signy was the kind of person who had trouble keeping her cards close to her chest when surprised or emotional, a fact brought home when he finally asked her out for coffee (mostly to get Aldous off his back), not knowing that she was planning to ask him that very moment. Shocked, she’d gone into a rant about him ruining her preemptive strike and how he always managed to have the last word which was so unfair, etcetera etcetera. 

But she accepted. Even admitting point blank she did, indeed, find him attractive. And they ended up having a nice time.

_You happy now, Aldous?_

“Ah- _hem_.”

He turned to glare at Professor Harris, who graced him with a knowing smirk before taking a sip of her punch.

“What do _you_ want?”

“Gee, a good-looking guy is staring in my girlfriend’s direction like a starving man at a buffet, and he wonders what I want?”

“You know damn well she’s not the one I’m staring at.”

“Professor Fersen? Didn’t know you swung both ways.”

“Cut the cute act, it doesn’t suit you.”

She shrugged. “Enough about me. How long are you gonna’ stare at Signy and her LBD before we have to pick your jaw up off the floor?”

“Until I leave, or she does.”

“Nope. That doesn’t sound stalkerish at all.”

“I’m not following her home, Harris. Just stewing in self-pity while she’s here.”

“Are you always this cheerful at Christmas parties?”

He crossed his arms. “Any particular reason you’ve come to pick on me?”

“For the same reason you pick on everyone else: it’s fun.”

“Am I that much of an ass?”

“Worse. For all your smarts and education, you couldn’t see the obvious if it was in a brightly marked package saying ‘right here!’”

“What are you babbling about?”

She took another insouciant sip of her drink. “So what are you two? Friends or what?”

“What’s it to you?”

“It’s just that you went on a kind-of-date a couple months ago, but don’t seem to be ‘going out’ in spite of the fact you’ve clearly got it bad for each other.”

“None of your goddamn business.”

She studied him under lowered eyelids. “We’ve got a bet going on campus.”

“Which is?”

“Whether or not you’ll get your head out of your ass before she jumps your probably-black bones.”

Audwin snorted. “The only jumping Signy Krohn’s doing is onstage.”

“Are you kidding? She’s ready to climb you like a tree!”

“Enough with the euphemisms, we’re not high-schoolers.”

Charlotte leaned forward and asked in a lower voice. “Why do you think she’s wearing black to the party?”

“Because it goes with everything? Hell if I know.”

“To get your attention.” She pointed at his neck. “Same reason you’re wearing a bright blue scarf.”

He wasn’t blushing. He was _not_. “It seemed festive.”

“And just so happens to match her eyes.”

“Since when did you teach Psychology?”

“Don’t need to.” She smiled sweetly. “You two are so obvious it hurts.”

“Charlotte?” Professor Boseman called from the other end of the room. “Could you help settle a bet over here?”

“Sure thing, Diane.” She gave Audwin a lazy wave. “Good luck. Don’t forget what I said.”

_I don’t think I could, even with a lobotomy._

True, he and Signy had developed a pretty strong rapport since the coffee… thing, had been on a first-name basis for a while, and might even tentatively call it a friendship. But honestly, he had no idea. He’d never been in a real relationship before. How the hell did these things work?

Suddenly he realized she was heading his way and tried to summon a nonchalant expression.

“Audwin!” She pointed at his scarf with a smile. “You’re actually wearing a color that’s not black!”

He was seriously regretting the choice of color now. “Why do people keep making such a big deal about it? I wear other colors… sometimes.”

“Never anything this bright.” She playfully tugged at one end of the article in question. “How are you liking the party?”

“Guess.”

“I should’ve known you’d be a total Grinch.”

“It’s Christmas. A holiday usually revolving around family and happy nostalgia. Well, I can’t stand my family, and don’t _have_ happy nostalgia, so the season doesn’t exactly leave me feeling the warm fuzzies.”

“Really?” Her smile dropped. “Sorry, I didn’t think of that. But you can still enjoy it with your friends.”

“My friends who won’t stop talking about their wonderful childhood Christmases.”

He started to regret saying this when she bit her lip. “Oh, I’m sorry if I’ve been insensitive.”

Audwin hadn’t told her much about his less-than-ideal upbringing, just left some hints that his relationship with his parents was never a good one, and things between him and his twin brother were always strained at best.

He hadn’t really intended on making this a pity-party, but she had the annoying tendency to draw these things out of him.

And seeing her bite her lip like that wasn’t helping his predicament any.

“It’s not your fault I’m such a stick in the mud during holidays. I just blame it on my parents, like everything else.”

She grinned with a determined glint in her eyes. “Well, I’m going to give you a happy Christmas memory if it’s the last thing I do!”

She already had, just showing up in that outfit. But he obviously couldn’t say that.

“What are you planning?”

Her smile widened. “Just wait and see.”

“Now I feel the _opposite_ of reassured.”

She rolled her eyes, then grabbed his hand and pulled him along. 

* * *

The rest of the party was… alright, he was willing to admit. Sure, he had to endure trite Christmas carols, jokes, and listening to a tipsy Professor D’Eon hiccupping through a rendition of Good King Wenceslas (which was admittedly funny, in a stupid way), but it honestly could’ve been much worse. The fact Professor Capet and her husband thought to invite him at all said volumes about them as people.

The only time he truly had any fun was when Signy was around, no surprise there, but he wasn’t as miserable as he thought he’d be. The others tried to include him in conversations, and seemed genuinely interested in his thoughts. A few had even laughed at some of his remarks.

He was still a little prickly around his coworkers, but both sides had softened up toward each other over the last year.

Yet it still took him completely off guard when, while announcing to the host and hostess that he was about to head home, their faces brightened and Professor Marie Capet said, “Oh wait! There’s something we’ve all been meaning to give you!”

“There is? All of you?”

“Well, a lot of people here chipped in, so yes.”

“…To _me_?”

“Yes! Gilbert, do you have it?”

“I do.” Dean du Mortier walked up to him holding a small box with a silver bow.

“What is this?” Audwin was feeling very bewildered.

The dean’s face looked slightly less rigid than it normally did. “We’ve never really given you much of a welcome to the university, Professor Vogel. We thought it might help make amends, if we’ve offended you.”

He solemnly handed the box to him, and suddenly Audwin was aware that nearly everyone had gone quiet and was watching him expectantly.

He stifled the discomfort and opened the gift.

It was pretty heavy for its size, and removing the packing foam revealed a small, blue, ceramic pot.

“What’s this?”

“A glazed censer.” Professor Capet said.

“From the 1920’s” Her husband Auguste added, looking more animated than Audwin had ever seen him “During the Ancient Egypt craze. Professor Krohn’s mentioned your appreciation for unusual or occult antiques…”

“Oh really? Was this her idea?” That would explain a lot.

“It was the collective idea of several people.” du Mortier said. “But her input was extremely helpful.”

“…Ah.”

He honestly wasn’t sure what he felt. On the one hand, he was overwhelmed with everyone watching him for his reaction, and the significance of the gift, which couldn’t have been cheap. But on the other, a warm and airy sensation filled his chest.

“I…” He cleared his throat. “I know I’m not the easiest person to get along with…”

“You’re definitely an acquired taste.” Charlotte Harris said, to everyone’s amusement.

“You don’t have to say anything that makes you uncomfortable.” Professor Capet smiled gently. “We know you appreciate it.” Several others voiced their agreement.

“Well…” He carefully rewrapped the censer. “…I should probably find a safe place to put this.” He nodded at everyone. “See you all on Monday.”

“Glad you like it!” Professor Fatih called after him as he went to the coat closet.

Maybe his coworkers weren’t so bad after all.

Oh screw it. They were amazing and he didn’t deserve them. But it would be a while before he’d admit it aloud.

He’d just put his coat and gloves back on when he heard Signy call him. “Wait a sec’!”

She hurried toward him with both hands behind her back, beaming and a little flushed, probably from laughter and the spiked punch.

Audwin smirked. “Did you know about this?” He gestured to the gift he’d placed on an entryway table.

“Of course I did! Nobody else really knew what you might like!”

“This was the happy Christmas memory you were talking about, wasn’t it?”

“Well, one of them.”

“There’s more?”

She pulled one hand from behind her back and handed him a flat box tied with a dark blue ribbon. “That present was from everyone, but this one’s just from me.”

It looked like the kind of box neckties came in, or a…

“It’s a scarf, isn’t it?”

“Hey!” She lightly swatted his shoulder. “No fair! How are you _always_ one step ahead of me?!”

“I’ve learned how to read you pretty well.” He opened the box, and sure enough there was a soft, high-quality scarf in deep, eggplant purple.

“I’d say the color suits me better than the one I’m already wearing.” He said, briefly allowing himself the luxury of that warm, syrupy feeling she elicited in him.

“You like it.” It wasn’t a question.

“It’ll suit.”

“I’ll take that as a ‘Thank you.’”

“If you want.” He said, feigning composure.

She brushed some hair from her face, and he got the feeling she was wanting to say something else, but seemed to be debating with herself. “Well… I’m glad.”

Then Audwin noticed something. “What else have you got behind your back?”

Her eyes widened and she grew redder. “How… you’re doing it again!”

“I’m not _trying_ to. You’ve got all the subtlety of a thrown brick. ”

Her gaze dropped to their feet, and her confidence seemed to waver. “I just… it’s nothing. But… please, don’t feel pressured or obligated.”

She slowly brought the hand forward, showing that it was clutching a sprig of mistletoe.

Audwin stared at it, his brain struggling to connect the pieces of what should have been an easy puzzle.

“I might’ve had a little too much to drink.” Signy muttered, eyes not meeting his.

“Was… this another happy Christmas memory you were planning?” He finally managed to ask, voice a little tight.

“I know it’s dumb and corny as hell! You really don’t have to do anything! I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable…”

“Where’d you even find it? It don’t remember seeing any hung up in this house.”

She squeezed her eyes shut, now almost as red as the artificial holly berries decorating the room. “I… sort of… brought it… with me.” 

“You…”

That warm syrupy feeling increased tenfold.

“You’ve been planning this for how long?”

“A few days… it just popped into my head and…” She started rambling. “And I was dumb enough to tell Charlotte and let her talk me into actually doing it…!”

“ _Harris_?!”

“How many other Charlottes do we both know?”

He thought to the other woman’s knowing expression from earlier, her goading him to take action, that smug grin…

_Harris you conniving minx!_

Audwin burst into laughter.

“What’s so funny?” Signy demanded sharply.

“She’s been orchestrating this! A couple hours ago she was going on and on about what an idiot I was and how obviously smitten we both are!”

Signy’s mouth dropped open. Then she let out a laugh of her own. “Oh my God! That sneak!”

“Was wearing black also her suggestion?”

She smiled up at him, looking through her lashes. “No. That was all mine.”

Oh the hell with it…

“Shouldn’t that thing be over our heads?” He pointed to the mistletoe. 

Signy looked started, as if she’d forgotten she was holding it. Then gave him a grin that was eager, teasing, and coy all at once. “I’m not sure. You’re so damn tall, I don’t think I can reach that far.”

Audwin felt himself smiling. “You’re a dancer. It should be a piece of cake.”

Apparently, that was all the encouragement she needed. Without further ado, she raised the sprig as high as her arm could stretch, stood up on her toes, and looped her other arm around his neck to pull him down and meet her halfway.

That warm, soft blankness from earlier returned, leaving just enough of his brain working to register sensations: velvet-soft lips, the taste of gloss, her chest against his, how natural if felt to wrap an arm around her narrow waist…

And suddenly it was over, and she was leaning back on her heels and smiling brightly, making no signs of removing her arm from his shoulders.

“Will that make a good memory?”

He was done for. A goner. Rest in peace.

“Pretty good.” He tried to smirk, but ended up grinning like an idiot. “Can I make a _great_ one?”

Signy laughed, an airy breathless kind of sound. “Oh, you smug bast…”

A shocked gasp caught their attention.

The both looked to see professors Davis and Boseman watching them with eyes like dinner plates.

“Oh!” The latter flushed and spun around. “Don’t… don’t mind us! We didn’t see anything! Just… carry on!”

She grabbed the still gaping Davis by the arm and dragged him off back to the party, where he’d probably blurt out what they’d seen to all and sundry. With any luck, everyone would attribute it to his clearly high level of intoxication.

“Damn.” Audwin grumbled.

Signy buried her face in his chest with an embarrassed laugh. “Oh God, this is going to be so awkward when I get back.”

“Do you even want to?”

“Yeah.” She looked back up, still smiling as she put a hand on his cheek. “We’ll need to make the next one quick, before anyone else comes along.”

He didn’t even ask if she was sure. It was pretty damn obvious. He just ducked down and molded his lips against hers a second time.

Yes indeed. He was a dead man. 

* * *

Late the following morning, Diane got a call from her coworker.

“Hey Edmund. How’re you feeling?”

“Oh… about as well as you’d expect.” Professor Davis answered, sounding like he hadn’t used his voice in years.

“Don’t expect me to feel sorry for you.”

“I know, it was entirely self-inflicted. I do have a question…”

“Yeah?”

“Did… did we really see Signy kiss Professor Vogel last night?”

Diane bit the inside of her cheek. “No, not really.” She replied, which was the truth. From the looks of things, they’d seen them just seconds _after_ the kiss actually happened.

“Really? I could’ve _sworn_ …”

“We didn’t.” She said definitively. “You were completely plastered. Now get rehydrated and take some aspirin or whatever. Talk to you later.”

“Okay then… thanks.”

Diane sighed as she disconnected and put her phone away. “Signy… you and Edgar Allen Poe Junior owe me big time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternate titles: 'First Kisses are Fucking Hard to Write!" or "Signy's LBD" 
> 
> Merry Christmas and Happy holidays everyone!


	10. Girl Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Set a week after "Dream Ending) Ms. Roslin reflects on how happy Signy is with her new life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my lovelies! I'm back, with more material and inspirations thanks to long chats with tacs-dutp on tumblr, and this is one result of us speculating about the conversations had with the newlyweds and their family after the Honeymoon week.

“… We did a lot of walking on the fifth day, just enjoying the woods and viewing the lake. We also did a bit of cleaning, which wasn’t fun per say but it can be incredibly satisfying…”

Roslin smiled to herself behind her teacup as her former charge spoke animatedly about her new life as a married woman and commoner, a life with only her husband and no more responsibilities than the two caring for each other and their home.

Judging from the light in Signy’s eyes and the heightened color riding her cheeks, it was a happy life indeed.

A full week after the wedding, the couple had come to visit their family at the castle (presumably at Signy’s behest, since Audwin probably would’ve been perfectly happy not seeing any of them until Christmas) and the two women had secluded themselves in the Solarium, drinking tea and nibbling on pastries while the younger enthusiastically described how wonderful the week had been.

True, newlyweds tended to see things through rose-colored glasses, but this new simple life of freedom to be nobody but herself suited the former heir to a tee.

“…You’d be surprised how much cleaning a tower that size needs after just a few days.” Signy finished.

“And to think,” Roslin teased gently, “I could hardly get you to put away your school supplies back in the day.”

The girl laughed. “Well, I have a better appreciation for tidying up now that I have no maids or staff to do it for me. Or to wash my laundry, which is surprisingly tricky.”

“Your husband’s magic doesn’t take care of that for both of you?”

Signy shrugged. “He’s offered, but I want to learn how to be more self-sufficient.”

“Well, I’m very proud of you, dear girl.”

Signy wrinkled her nose. “Cooking, on the other hand… I almost caused a fire the first time I tried, so I let him take care of that.”

Roslin chuckled. “Very wise.”

A year ago she never would’ve seen this coming.

Like everyone else, she thought Princess Signy’s life would go as planned from her infancy, the way her father’s life had gone, and her grandfather’s, and her great-grandmother’s…

She would choose her spouse and royal consort during her coming-of-age celebration, marry her choice in a grand ceremony, and then be officially declared future monarch. She’d then gradually take on more and more responsibilities until her father either passed away or decided to retire, in which case she’d be crowned Queen Regent, hopefully have at least one child to inherit the throne after her, and the cycle would continue.

Though the girl had much potential and could be quite capable when she put her mind to it, there were times Roslin worried for her. Worries which turned out to be well-founded. The tumultuous weeks following the disastrous ball had taken a lot out of the poor princess, all the stress and difficult decisions that affected many people, if not the whole kingdom.

Roslin never would’ve thought Signy would arrange for someone to take her place.

And she never, _ever,_ would’ve thought she’d happily marry the very man she’d tried to defeat.

But that was before she saw the sorcerer change, and Signy’s heart soften toward him.

In the months following Glorion’s invasion and the disastrous near-wedding, the princess stayed close to the twins, seeing that the emotional wounds healed along with the physical, all the years of misunderstandings and resentments coming to light. Her friendship with Aldous grew closer, but her relationship with Audwin took a completely unexpected turn.

He became a different man around her, one capable of love and gentleness, who possessed a creative and artistic mind. Buried beneath that dark, rough exterior was a kindred spirit that also longed for freedom and the beautiful wildness of nature, and it called out to Signy.

The announcement of their engagement had come as a shock to most of the kingdom, but not to Roslin.

She’d seen the soft looks, the passing touches that lingered, heard the fondness in the couple’s voices. She’d heard them encourage, tease, and cheer each other. And she’d even noticed the tension brought about by mutual physical attraction (but she was hardly the only one to notice _that,_ if the servant rumor mill was anything to go by).

So she was hardly surprised when Signy chose Audwin over is brother. And she happily gave them her blessing.

Some, understandably, questioned the wisdom of the princess abdicating and giving her position to a relative stranger from another country, albeit a very good and capable one. But seeing Signy look happier on her wedding day– her real one – than she had in all the years Roslin had known her, and any doubts on the older woman’s part that this wasn’t the best option evaporated.

Had she kept the throne, she would’ve been expected to resume her duties straight away, giving the new spouses very little time to be alone. This way, they had a whole week to themselves, getting used to living together and bonding further.

Ah yes. _Bonding._

Roslin might’ve been an old spinster, but she definitely wasn’t born yesterday. She knew that glowing contentment and those rosy cheeks weren’t just from Signy’s newfound freedom. To say nothing of…

“Are you two having trouble with mosquitos?”

“Mosquitos?” The younger woman looked confused. “Well, no. Not this time of year. Why?”

Roslin quirked a brow. “You and your husband seem to be littered with bites.” She gestured to her neck.

Signy’s face was blank for a moment.

Then blushed a violent shade of red as her eyes widened.

“Oh _no…_ ” She gave a strangled sound as her hands flew up in the vain attempt to cover the fading love-bites on her neck. “Dear God! Did anyone else…?”

“Rest Easy, Signy. I’m fairly certain nobody has looked close enough.”

“Damn that man! He said they’d be gone by now!”

“They’re not too obvious, I grant you. But not quite gone, either.”

Signy buried her red face in her hands with a groan. “Ms Roslin… I am _so_ sorry!”

“You have nothing to be sorry about, my dear. It’s perfectly normal. Healthy, even.”

The young woman’s eyes peered out over her hands. “I know… I just never thought I’d be talking to _you_ about it…”

“I’m the one who told you about the Facts of Life, remember?”

Signy managed a giggle. “How could I forget?”

Roslin shook her head. “My father was a country doctor and my mother was an herbalist. I’ve just about heard it all, so it will take much more than _that_ to shock me. Although if you’d rather we dropped the subject…”

The young woman smiled bashfully. “I think I’ll be fine as long as you don’t ask for too many details.”

“Believe me, I don’t plan to. The look on your face says all I wish to know.”

Signy beamed quietly, taking another sip of her tea. “What does it say?”

Roslin reached over and took her hand. “It says you’re truly happy, my dear. And that’s all I truly wanted.”

An impish light came to the princess’s eye. “Even if it means being married to a practitioner of magic with questionable morals?”

Roslin shrugged. “He loves you and treats you the way you deserve, you love him the same, and you make each other happy. Everything else is neither here nor there, as far as I’m concerned. And I have no doubt you’ll keep him on the straight and narrow.”

“Oh, don’t worry about it.”

Roslin frowned into her teacup. “I could do without him grinning like the cat that got the canary, though.”

Signy rolled her eyes, though the gesture seemed to be one of fond exasperation. “Yes, well after seeing it for a full week you get used to it.”

Roslin could make a fairly educated guess _why_ the young man was looking so smug, especially while in the presence of the brother who also happened to be a former rival in Signy’s affections.

 _Honestly… Men._ She thought wryly. 

* * *

The couple bid their goodbyes late that afternoon, wanting to start for home before it got very dark.

It didn’t escape Roslin’s notice that Prince Aldous was looking… distinctly uncomfortable, for lack of a better description, and he seemed to be having trouble making eye-contact with his brother and new sister-in-law, even when hugging the latter goodbye.

“Your Highness, are you alright?” Roslin asked him.

“Oh, erm, yes.” He gave a quick smile that looked more like a grimace. “I’m perfectly fine. Top notch.”

“You and your brother were talking together for quite some time.” King Edward commented before his fiancé could question the prince further. “Nice to see you two getting along so well.”

“Yeah… Um, nice.” The disturbed look on Aldous’s face and its accompanying blush suggested that his twin shared a bit more information about the honeymoon week than he would’ve liked.

“Now,” Edward smiled at his fiancé. “What did you girls talk about?” 

“Just the usual sort of thing.” Roslin winked at him. “… Though I’ll be _very_ surprised if you’re not a grandfather by this time next year.”

“As will I.” Poor Aldous murmured, looking vaguely nauseous. 

Edward’s eyebrows migrated up his forehead. “Is that so?”

The Chief Minister gave a tired sigh behind them. “Newlyweds: Always so exhausting to be around them…” 

* * *

The castle wasn’t even completely out of site before Signy stopped and gave her husband a stern look, crossing her arms.

“Alright, what did you tell him?”

The attempt at an innocent expression was laughable. “Who?”

“Your brother. I leave you two alone for an hour at most and he looks like he saw a ghost. What did you say?”

Audwin shrugged. “I simply answered his question?”

“Which was…?”

“How was our week?”

“And what answer did you give him?”

“You’ve got a suspicious mind, you know that?”

Signy grinned. “I prefer to use the term, ‘canny’.”

The corners of his mouth twitched upward. “I truly _have_ been a terrible influence.”

“Keep evading the question all you want, I’ll get the answer out of you sooner or later.”

“Is that a promise?”

“If you want it to be.” She smiled sweetly, in a way that told him he should be worrying about what awaited him once they got home.

He couldn’t wait to find out. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> … Audwin MAY have been bragging about the wedding night (and every night after that).  
> Poor Aldous. 
> 
> I love the thought of Ms Roslin breaking the "prudish old spinster" stereotype. And yes, it is a personal headcanon that her father was a doctor, and that she was the one who gave Signy "The Talk".


	11. This is My Idea (Part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What if Audwin had been raised by his parents alongside Aldous, and their kingdom never fell?  
> Chances are, he'd probably be betrothed at a young age to a certain princess in a diplomatic marriage. But these two being themselves, it comes off to a rocky start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I asked myself "What if...?" and this two-parter was born. Originally it was just one chapter, but I felt like it was too long, and thus split it into two. Don't worry, the second part is coming soon. 
> 
> And yes, the title did come from the song in Swan Princess.

“Come in.” Signy answered the knock on her study door.

One of the footmen came in. “Your Royal Highness, the Chief Minister has settled from his return and asks permission to speak with you at your earliest convenience.”

“By all means. I think now would be a great time” She stood from her desk.

The servant led her to the East Sitting Room, where her father’s Chief Minister and lifelong friend sat, wearing a tired yet satisfied expression as he unwound with a glass of sherry. “Uncle Arthur?”

“Good afternoon, Signy.” He nodded and gave her a brief smile. “Sorry if I interrupted whatever you were doing.”

“It wasn't anything pivotal.” She sat beside her godfather with a warm smile. “So, how was it? Besides the official version.” 

“Could not have gone better. King Rupert and Prince Aldous were most gracious, and their board of ministers ran like a well-oiled machine.”

“That’s great!”

He took a sip of his sherry. “I also had an enlightening visit with Prince Audwin.”

Her smile, and pleasant mood, dropped. “Oh, did you?”

The older man nodded. “He’s doing remarkable in his studies. He’s even written a thesis that he submitted to the Royal University’s ornithology department. Something about owls, I’m afraid most of the details flew over my head. I’ve not seen him so animated as he was when we talked about it.” 

“Good for him.” She replied flatly.

“He’s grown into a very interesting young man. Got a mind like a steel trap. Perhaps a bit cheekier than his father would like…” 

“Sorry Uncle,” The future queen gave her godfather a tired smile. “But I just can’t feign interest in that man.”

The Chief Minister gave a light wave of his hand. “I’m not expecting you to, my Dear. I just wanted you to know he’s actually, finally, won my personal approval as your godparent, which I’d given up on ever happening.”

“Oh? Is he that much different than the snarky little jerk that kept snubbing me and called me a ninny?”

“His core personality hasn’t changed, and he’s certainly not what one might call overly solicitous…”

“Then he still hasn’t won my own personal approval.”

Arthur looked exhausted. “Signy, you were _children_. How can you hold what he said against him after all this time, especially considering you’ve not seen him in ten years?” 

“Because it smarted, and I was just a frightened little girl hoping I could get him to like me, but never got the chance.”

The Chief Minister took a rather large sip of his sherry. “The problem is the two of you are too stubborn. If you’d both let go of your pride, I’m certain you’d get along very well.”

“Somehow I doubt it.” People had been saying that for years now.

“Well, I can’t make you like him. I’ll just leave it in the hands of The Almighty.”

“Sounds good.” She smiled again, patting his hand. “And welcome home.”

* * *

For maybe as long as she could remember, Signy had been told that her husband would be chosen for her, and that he’d be someone very important who’d bring much benefit to her and the kingdom, with a pedigree befitting a Prince Consort.

It was simply a part of life as princess, and though she’d never been fond of the idea, always being rather “headstrong and spirited” as her elders put it, she never fought it, simply accepting it as a necessary evil. More importantly, she trusted her parents to choose a man who’d be good to her.

She was only about six when the candidate was found.

The king and queen of a powerful nearby kingdom desired to make an alliance, and had twin sons just a couple years older than her. The elder was an heir apparent like Signy, so he was out of the running. The younger twin, however… 

It all happened so quickly, and before she knew it she was betrothed to this boy she’d just barely even heard of. Signy was so taken off guard that she’d even cried a little when her parents told her. But she didn’t argue or throw a tantrum, just wiped her tears and made herself bear it. 

Then she actually met her intended, and it all went downhill from there.

The two royal families decided to meet that autumn at a country estate near the kingdom border, in the hopes that the prince and princess might develop a bond if they met in person. Signy remembered the journey as the longest and most miserable carriage ride of her life, where she vacillated between annoyance at the situation, and nervousness.

She also remembered expressing her surprise when she saw the twin princes and noticed that, while bearing a great resemblance to each other, were not mirror images like she’d expected all twins to be, prompting her mother to explain that they were “fraternal” twins, rather than identical. 

And, most vividly of all, she remembered praying desperately that the brother with a very disgruntled expression on his narrow face, who looked down at her like she was a lump of horse manure, wasn’t Audwin, and the despair when learning this was indeed her future husband.

It did not get better.

While his parents and brother (who was _so_ much nicer) went out of their way to make her feel welcome, he didn’t bother hiding his distain behind the scripted words of greeting his parents doubtlessly made him rehearse beforehand. Those were the only remotely kind things he’d ever spoken to her. Afterwards he used every opportunity to stay away from Signy, refusing to include her or even be remotely civil in his doings, teasing her for being a “little girl” despite the fact he was only about two years older.

But the final straw was when he made fun of her for trying to demonstrate her intelligence by referring to him and his brother as “infernal twins”.

“It’s _fraternal_ twins, you Ninny!” He’d jeered.

To which she’d retorted, “Yeah? Well you look like a weasel!”

Both were soundly disciplined, their parents apologized to each other, and Signy deemed him her lifelong nemesis. From that moment on, whenever they spoke to each other outside the grownups’ hearing, he’d refer to her as “Ninny” or “Dummy”, while she rather glibly christened him “Weasel-Face”. Attempts by his brother Aldous to keep the peace were in vain.

The end of the visit was a relief to everyone. Yet, that didn’t stop their parents from getting them together the following year, and again the year after that. These were hardly less disastrous than the first meeting, with the two children either pointedly avoiding each other or bickering.

Rather disconcerting was the number of times she’d caught him apparently studying her with an unreadable expression, causing him to frown or make a face at her before immediately looking away. Honestly, she wasn’t sure what to make of it.

It was only the company of Prince Aldous that kept things from becoming unbearable. As kind and sympathetic as his brother was churlish and rude, he never called her names or did anything to imply her thoughts and opinions were silly, and he frequently cajoled his twin into letting her come along with them. While Audwin generally preferred to be on his own, the other two spent many hours at a time playing and exploring together.

Signy never voiced the thought aloud, but she found herself wishing that their birth order was reversed, and Aldous was the one she would marry. 

But then she had more important things to be sad about, when her mother sickened and died, and it felt like her whole world came to a screeching halt.

Any future visits were shelved indefinitely, and Signy hadn’t seen Audwin since.

They did exchange a few stiff and formal letters over the years at the urging of their elders, and had also been appraised of each other’s accomplishments. Signy was told that he loved reading, nature and the outdoors, proved to have a keen intellect, and had a great affinity for birds, particularly crows, ravens, and owls. He was also quite artistic and creative, showing a great deal of talent in many different mediums.

But while these all sounded like lovely traits, the image of the weedy, dark-haired boy with the sour face and mocking voice never left Signy when she thought about him.

There was, however, one kind thing he’d done for her.

Shortly after her mother’s death, he and his family wrote letters expressing their condolences. For obvious reasons, she put off reading Audwin’s, but found a pleasant and touching surprise when she finally opened it.

Folded inside the envelope was a charcoal portrait of her mother, simple and inexpert but showing a surprising amount of talent for someone Audwin’s age at the time and managing to capture her warmth and laughter. The letter accompanying it was short, but more personal than any he’d sent before or since. 

_Dear Signy,_

_I’m really sorry about your mother. And I’m not just saying that because I’m expected to. Hearing about her death left me truly sad for her loss. She seemed like a very kind and wonderful person, and nobody should lose their mother._

_I thought you might like this drawing. It’s not too good, but everyone thought you’d appreciate it._

_Until I see you again,_

_HRH Prince Audwin._

To be honest, she’d been incredibly touched.

She still had both the letter and sketch somewhere in her things, and would think of them whenever she felt particularly frightened for the future.

Maybe everyone was right. Maybe her pride was one of the biggest problems between them.

But then again, so was his.

However, she wasn’t going to back out of it. She’d accept and face her duty with as much dignity as she could muster. With any luck, she and Audwin would learn to at least tolerate each other and form a truce of sorts, just enough to live together and _(shudder)_ beget an heir.

Perhaps, by some miracle, after a few years they could even become friends. But she wasn’t particularly hopeful. 

* * *

_“They’re what?!”_

“Coming to the ball.”

Signy’s stomach twisted into knots at her father’s words. No, _square_ knots. “But... This is so sudden! Why… I mean…”

Edward XII chuckled, abashed. “I’d think your future husband and brother-in-law would be right to expect an invitation to your coming-of-age!”

“I know… but nobody mentioned it to me!”

“Well, it was rather last-minute. I’m so sorry I didn’t run it by you first…”

“No, it’s fine.” She sighed. “Of course they should attend something so important, especially since the wedding will probably be next year.”

Edward gently took his daughter’s hand. “You have nothing to be nervous about, my dear. Audwin has matured greatly since the two of you were climbing trees and throwing mud at each other.” Laugher twinkled in his eyes. “And Aldous was here just a few years ago.”

“No matter how many times I tell myself that, I can’t stop worrying.” Signy admitted. “After ten years I’m finally seeing the man I’m supposed to marry, and we didn’t leave on good terms. How could anybody feel anything but anxious?”

“True.” His smile became soft and knowing. “But there was that letter he sent after your mother passed.”

“Yes, there is that.”

“Maybe he’s decided to give you another chance. He probably feels sorry for being a little rotter,” This comment made Signy laugh. “But hasn’t found the chance to apologize.”

“Maybe.”

“How could he not like you? You’ve got all your mother’s charm and warmth. Now that he’s presumably past the age where he finds all girls icky…”

She laughed again, feeling just a teeny little bit better. “One can only hope.”

Edward smiled gently. “Joking aside, Signy, your mother and I never would’ve betrothed you to him if we thought for one minute he would treat you poorly. Yes, we had our worries when you were children, but we waited to see what he’d become as an adult, and he’s matured so much… I’m certain you two would get along splendidly if you let yourselves.”

And that was the crux of the matter. Signy trusted her father, and everyone involved with putting this marriage through. That included Uncle Arthur, who claimed he now personally approved of her groom-to-be, and he was normally such a critical person. Surely if he thought Audwin would make a decent husband to her…

Even Aldous, who was just as aware and willing to acknowledge his twin’s flaws as Arthur, seemed optimistic whenever she’d seen or written to him. 

Yet, she could never completely rid herself of the anxiety tightening her chest and stomach whenever she thought about it. 

* * *

June swept in, and the final preparations were underway for both her coming-of-age celebration and the twin princes’ visit.

The details regarding, décor, food, and drink were fine-tuned and carried out. Fresh flowers, ribbons, and bunting arrived by the wagonfull. Menus were planned, every millimeter of the castle was scrubbed clean. Signy was fitted for both a new evening dress and ballgown. And anticipation buzzed through the halls like a giant beehive.

And Signy was nearly sick with stress and nerves.

It was all happening too fast. Where had the time gone? She was growing up, Audwin was coming to see her, and there was nothing she could do to stop it. By this time next year, she’d be the crowned heir, a married woman, and two steps closer to the throne.

She was not, and would never be, ready.

The time ticked on. Hour by hour, day by day, week by week…

And suddenly, it was the eve of Audwin and Aldous’s arrival.

She couldn’t focus on anything. Her mind was a whirl of emotions, attempts to reason with herself, and that mocking young voice yelling _“Ninny!”_

By nightfall, she couldn’t take any more.

She asked her maids and former governess Ms. Roslin for the rest of the evening alone to unwind, and they happily granted it. The latter stroked her hair and planted a kiss on her forehead.

“I know it’s all so daunting, but it will work out wonderfully, Signy. I promise you that.”

She sincerely appreciated the sentiment, but inwardly wondered how Ms. Roslin could be so sure, as the older woman was neither married, nor had ever met Audwin in the first place.

After a few minutes of quiet, Signy pulled out a maid’s uniform from its hiding place at the back of her wardrobe and slipped it on. For once, she did not bring any bread, cheese, or seeds with her as she left toward her sanctuary in the woods. She hadn’t the time.

Well out of the castle’s view, she could finally breathe.

The deep woods were a place of, paradoxically, both wildness and calm. Where rules, protocol, and expectations didn’t exist, and she was not the princess but merely Signy. The moon was just a mere sliver tonight, casting very little light, but she’d traversed this forest so often she could probably find her way blindfolded.

Her favorite area was the lake. She’d always loved watching the swans, hearing the frogs and splashing water, smelling the waterweed, lilies, and reeds. At times, she would spend hours laying at the bank and absorbing the simple quiet.

Signy found a place near an elm and sat on the ground heedless of the dew, leaning against the trunk and closing her eyes. The sounds of crickets and other night animals hummed around her like an ancient song.

She would give anything to live here. To just be herself, free of duty and expectation.

Free of the unpleasant person she was bound to marry.

She must’ve dozed off a bit, losing track of time, when suddenly the hoot of an owl nearby woke her.

Signy pried her eyes open, taking in the position of the moon. It was almost time for her to go back.

But just a few more minutes.

She heard another hoot, and followed the sound to the branches of a nearby weeping willow where she could faintly see its shape in the shadows, a patch of weak moonlight showing its face.

“Good evening.” She greeted with a smile.

It blinked, almost looking surprised that a human would speak to it, making Signy laugh.

“You don’t know how lucky you are.” She said. “All you have to worry about is getting enough food and watching out for bigger animals, most of which can’t fly. Me? I have more complex matters to occupy my time.”

Its head cocked slightly, as if listening.

“I have a lot of big responsibilities. One of which involves marrying a man I hardly know, and don’t particularly like.”

The owl blinked again.

“It’s very common, and I’ve always known it was coming. But I’m definitely not looking forward to it. At least _you_ get to pick your own mate.”

Perhaps she was imagining things, but the way it was looking at her now seemed almost… skeptical?

“Honestly, I could’ve gotten worse. But we don’t exactly get along, in the few times we’ve met in person. Between the two of us, he’s a snide ass, if you’ll excuse my language.”

She looked down and started plucking out blades of grass. “People keep saying it’s because I’m being too prideful, and maybe they’re right. But he’s never exactly tried to apologize, so…”

After a few minutes of silence, movement from the corner of her eye made her look up and see the owl soundlessly alight on the ground right beneath its perch, all but disappearing into the shadows.

Signy managed a little smile. “Sorry, I’m probably boring you.”

At the spot she thought it was standing, two soft, purple lights began to glow, casting enough illumination to show they were coming from the owl’s eyes.

Signy gasped. What on earth…?!

Suddenly the owl was enveloped in dark smoke, making Signy cry out and jump to her feet.

Her confusion and panic only rose when the smoke cleared to reveal someone crouching on the ground, eyes still glowing purple.

“OH DEAR GOD…!”

“Calm down, will you?” The figure grumbled in a young man’s voice, the light in his eyes dimming until it ceased altogether. “If I wanted to hurt you, I’d have done so already.”

His words did nothing to slow her galloping heart. She pressed herself against the elm’s trunk, as if she could somehow merge with its bark and vanish. “W-who… what… _what are you?”_

“You’ve heard of sorcerers, haven’t you?’ The stranger leaned back into a seated position against the willow’s trunk (she thought, it was hard to determine in the darkness). “Wizards? Magicians? Practitioners in the arcane and occult? Take your pick.” 

“I… I…” She swallowed and struggled to collect herself. “What do you want from me?”

The man scoffed. “Nothing, except maybe a little conversation with an intelligent and somewhat interesting person. But I must admit, your reaction has me a little disappointed.”

Annoyance flared in her chest strong enough to eclipse her shock and fear. “What did you expect?! Me to just say ‘Oh, a sorcerer? How do you do, sir? I hope the flying’s been good’!”

The got a faint chuckle out of him. “Fair point.”

“Not to mention I’m a woman alone with a strange man in the middle of nowhere with nobody to hear if I scream…!”

“Also true.” He conceded. “Though something tells me you’d have little trouble defending yourself.”

“Against a wizard?!”

He didn’t have an answer to that.

“I can’t believe this!”

Somehow, she could tell the man was smiling. “Just think of it as an interesting story to impress your snide ass of a future husband with.”

“He’ll think I’ve lost my mind!” Signy gave a disbelieving laugh. “I’m starting to think maybe I _have!”_

“If you did, you probably wouldn’t know it.”

She crossed her arms, watching him warily. “I suppose you’ve got a name?”

“You suppose rightly. But don’t expect me to freely give it to a total stranger.”

“The same goes for me.”

“Wise woman.”

Signy carefully seated herself again. It was pretty clear that if this man truly meant her any harm, he’d have been much more subtle and not revealed himself.

“So,” He began. “You’re arranged to marry someone?”

“You’ve been listening.”

“What kind of a man is he? Besides snide and an ass, I mean.”

“Why should I tell you?”

“To get an outsider’s opinion? It’s up to you.”

“He’s…" She struggled to find a short description to sum it all up. "...infuriating.”

“In what way?”

“As children he’d always treat me like a nuisance, call me names, and try to leave me out of things.”

“You’ve known each other that long?”

“In a way. I haven’t seen him for quite some time.”

“But he was just a child.” The stranger pointed out. “Kids usually get snippy when the adults make them include someone they don’t like or don’t know. Especially boys, they tend to be silly about playing with girls.”

“His brother didn’t seem to have any trouble.” She sniffed.

The stranger didn’t seem to respond for a moment, at least verbally

“His… brother?”

“Twin brother.”

The sorcerer didn’t say anything for a while, and she started to wonder if maybe she’d given away too much information. After all, how many women in this kingdom could say they were arranged to marry a twin? 

“Please say something, you’re scaring me.”

He cleared his throat. “Sorry. Do you… do you like his brother better?” His tone sounded a bit less breezy and confident than before, holding an odd sort of reservation.

“Well, I get along with him much better. He’s very kind, dependable, responsible, gentle…”

“… And dull as sawdust, from the sound of it.”

“Hey!”

“So you _do_ like him?’ He sounded almost accusatory.

“Not that way! I enjoy being friends with him, and I’ll be proud to call him my brother-in-law, but I have no untoward affections for him.”

The stranger thought this over for a minute or two. “You said it’s been a while since you’ve seen your betrothed.”

“About ten years.”

“Ten?” He laughed. “What make you think he hasn’t changed in all that time? A lot happens between the ages of… how old was he last time you saw him?”

“Ten.”

“A lot happens between the ages of ten and twenty. He’s probably not the same little brat that called you names.”

“Yeah. My godfather saw him a few weeks ago, and seems impressed with him. And my godfather isn’t easily impressed.”

“There you go.”

“But he said his personality isn’t that different.”

“Is that really a bad thing? Do you really find his personality itself to be that odious?”

“I never said that! I just… well… I guess… I figured that meant he himself hadn’t changed much.” She stared into her lap. “But now that I think about it… his personality itself wasn’t the problem, so much as his attitude.”

“He probably thought the same of you. Do you not have much in common?” 

“Well…” Signy thought a moment. “If what people tell me is true, we both love reading, and nature. I love animals, and he likes birds. I think, we both have times when we’d rather be alone, somewhere quiet.”

“So I see.”

She realized she was smiling a little. “From what I hear, he’s rather odd. Not that it’s a bad thing. His favorite birds are crows, of all things. Most people don't like them.”

“Including you?”

She thought for a moment. “You know, I’m not sure I really have an opinion on them. I hardly know anything about crows, just that they’re scavengers and they sometimes steal from people.”

“A lot of birds steal from people.” The stranger remarked. “Usually seeds, fruits, or materials to make their nests with. A lot of animals in general will become thieves if given the opportunity, even cute little squirrels. Crows and ravens are just more notorious for it because they look and sound wicked, and because they like shining objects, so sometimes steal jewelry.”

“I never thought about it that way.” She knew some animals would filch from gardens and crops. Squirrels, like he said, rabbits, robins… but they were quieter, and less ugly, so people were inclined to view them less harshly than crows.

“Few people do. We know it’s foolish to judge something by appearance or first impressions, yet we do it all the time.”

“I know…” she twisted plucked stems of grass between her fingers. 

“But something tells me it’s more than that, where your future husband’s involved.”

She bit her lip. How could a perfect stranger read her so well, just from her words and tone?

Maybe because he had no biases or preconceived notions about her.

“I think… I’m just afraid.”

“Of what?”

“Of… of getting married soon, pledging my whole life to this man, whom I hardly know. We’ll be husband and wife before the eyes of God and man, most likely have children, and spend the rest of our lives together. I… how can I be anything but terrified?”

The stranger said nothing, but she could tell he was studying her.

“I know that’s not a good reason to dislike him,” She continued. “I just don’t know what it’s going to be like… I hate not knowing.”

“Doesn’t everybody?”

She sighed. “I guess…”

“He’s probably just as scared as you are.” The man said, softly. “Maybe he’s always been, and picking on you was his way of dealing with it. Not a good way to deal with it, mind, but… boys can be stupid that way.”

She snorted. But truthfully, she’d never really thought about it that way.

Of course he’d be frightened like her. He was only a little boy, watching people make an important and permanent life decision for him, choosing his future wife when getting married was probably the last thing he wanted. 

“I know you’re right.” She told the stranger.

“I doubt he’ll ever be your dream man,” The sorcerer continued. “But you may end up liking him more than you think.”

“Maybe.” She bit her lip again. “But will he like me?”

The stranger chuckled. “If he doesn’t, he’s an idiot.”

Signy flushed a little.

“Sorry, but I should get going.” The stranger said ruefully. “Thank you for the chat. I wish you the best of luck.” 

Once again he was covered by smoke, resuming his owl shape, then flew off. And Signy couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed to see him go.

What a night. 

* * *

The experience certainly left an impression on her, and not just because it involved getting relationship advice from a mysterious, shape-shifting magician.

The man had a good point. A lot of evidence seemed to point at Audwin being much improved from the sulking brat that made fun of her. Uncle Arthur’s observations, Aldous’s comments, her father’s judgment, and most importantly of all, the letter and drawing.

She should’ve known this. But instead had clung onto her fear and wounded pride, the opinions ingrained into her child mind, telling herself she couldn’t trust anybody’s judgment but her own and people didn’t easily change.

It was true, people didn’t easily change. But attitudes and opinions did.

Maybe his had changed towards her.

The question was, how much?

After returning home and going to bed, she slept surprisingly well the rest of the night, exhausted from her jaunt. The next morning, some traces of nervousness still remained, but she also felt excitement.

She was genuinely curious to see what kind of person he was now, and realized she was looking forward to finding out.

As Ms. Roslin helped her get dressed, Signy thought of something and summoned a maid.

“There will be plenty of time before the princes arrive. Could you please fetch me a book from the castle library to read between preparations?”

“Certainly, Your Highness. Any in particular?”

“One about birds, preferably with a section on crows.”

The girl looked slightly confused, but bowed. “I’ll... see what I can find.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TO BE CONTINUED...


	12. This is My Idea (Part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Signy sees Audwin again for the first time since they were children, and things seem to be going... surprisingly well.  
> But who was that mysterious stranger last night?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we have it folks, the conclusion! Get ready for a bit o' humor and more than a little fluff.

_Fascinating! Do any other animals make tools? Probably none in Europe._

_Maybe that’s one reason they’re so notorious for stealing, they’re more clever and successful than other animals._

“Princess!”

Signy looked up from the book, a rather interesting tome titled _Physiology and Behaviors of European Birds,_ to see the Chief Minister’s tense, even slightly panicked, expression. “They’ve just arrived!”

“Already?!” She’d been so engrossed in her reading the time had gotten away from her. A glance at the clock proved it to be around noon. “Oh wow!” she quickly closed her book and set it aside to follow him to the grand hall.

Her father was babbling in a futile attempt to not appear nervous. “Oh my dear, you look lovely! Don’t you think she looks lovely, Arthur? Goodness, you’ll leave him speechless! Not that he’s only concerned with looks, I’m sure! But looks aren’t terrible. I hear he’s gotten quite handsome, but then again that sort of thing can be very subjective…”

“Father, breathe!” 

Edward stopped talking, taking her advice with a few deep, slow breaths in and out. “Forgive me, Signy. I suppose I’m feeling a bit more jittery than I thought I would.”

“A _bit?”_ Uncle Arthur snorted. 

Signy smoothed out a few remaining wrinkles from her father’s shirt. “It’ll be fine. I’m as ready as I’ll ever be, which is more than I thought.”

“Ah, that’s my brave girl!” He beamed.

She didn’t feel particularly brave. Her stomach was still fluttering and her palms were a little clammy. But at the same time, there was the excitement of learning what happened next. 

This was it.

Signy took her place on her father’s right, while the Chief Minster stood at his left. As she heard the footsteps approaching down the hall, she smiled and held her head high.

She was the future queen, she could be as gracious and dignified as the rest of them.

The herald was the first to enter. “Presenting their Royal Highnesses, Prince Aldous and Prince Audwin of ___!”

The brothers stepped into the room, and Signy felt her eyes widen in shock.

Had she not been so thoroughly practiced, her mouth would’ve fallen open too.

 _Good LORD, he’s gotten tall!_ Was her initial thought. _And so… so…!_

Clearly, she’d been holding on a little too tightly to that mental image of the gangly boy with too-sharp features.

Or else, she’d thought he’d look very much like Aldous did five years ago, or at least be the same height. Instead, he was easily the tallest man in the room, his shoulders reaching higher than her head.

And that wasn’t all. Oh no.

Somehow in the last ten years, he’d gotten handsome as all get-out.

He’d grown into the features that had seemed ungainly on a boy of eight to ten, as well as those ridiculously long legs (noting he still had them made her smile internally). Some features were sharper and more angular, but it suited him. 

Even his dress and manner made him stand out. He wore a mostly black outfit, contrasting with Aldous’s uniform of gold and ivory, and his hair was longer than the current fashion, left without any product or pomade. His mannerisms were more relaxed and almost lackadaisical as he strode in alongside his serious and poised twin.

But the most important question still remained to be answered: How had his personality matured?

It was hard to tell at a glance. His expression looked relaxed, almost bored, hinting along with the way he carried himself that he hadn’t lost his tendency to be irreverent. But at least he didn’t look angry or annoyed, so she took it as a hopeful sign.

Then his eyes locked directly on hers.

She was so startled she immediately looked away towards her father, who was greeting them.

“Welcome, my boys! Welcome from this entire kingdom!”

The twins bowed, though Audwin’s gesture was more abrupt and perfunctory. In response Edward nodded and Arthur bowed while Signy curtseyed.

“Your Majesty!” Aldous grinned. "It’s so good to see you all again!”

“Likewise, my boy! Goodness, you two have grown!”

Audwin gave a faint smile. “Yes, a bad habit we picked up in early childhood.” He said, wryly.

Signy froze.

That voice...

Was she hearing rightly?

Audwin’s remark got a laugh out of Edward, and a tired sigh from Aldous, who then turned his attention to her.

“Princess Signy,” He smiled warmly. “We’ve been looking forward to talking in person with you again! Goodness, you look so much like your mother… wow!”

Signy returned his smile. “I’ll take that as a compliment, thank you. How’s your own mother doing?”

“Very well, thanks for asking.”

She turned back to her betrothed, having to tilt her head back to meet his eyes again. “Audwin, it’s been so long! I hardly recognized you!”

His eyebrows raised a fraction. “Is that a good thing, or bad?”

She froze again.

_I must be crazy!_

_But he sounds just like…!_

Her mind ran furiously, trying to make sense of what her ears were telling her.

Then she realized he was still waiting for her response. “Um… neither. It was just an observation.”

His smile grew wider, mischief shining in his eyes. “So, I take it I don’t look like a weasel anymore?”

The Chief Minister sputtered a little. Aldous shot an imploring look toward the ceiling.

Signy felt her polite smile become a real one. “Not even remotely.”

“Thank heavens for that.”

The entire room breathed a collective sigh of relief. 

* * *

Eventually they all adjourned to one of the sitting rooms to chat about this and that, after which they all had a late lunch, followed by a rest period where everyone went about doing whatever to unwind, giving the princes ample time to finish settling in their rooms.

The whole visit wasn’t unpleasant so far, Audwin had been charming in a rather dry, flippant way, yet the whole time Signy felt disjointed, and tense.

Every time he spoke, she grew just a little more convinced.

The very same voice, the very same speech mannerisms, the very same nonchalance. How could it be coincidence?

Not to mention the stranger’s odd reaction to hearing her intended had a twin brother, then suddenly expressing a need to know if she actually liked the brother better. Had he realized who he was speaking to?

But that was absurd! Her betrothed, Prince Audwin, a sorcerer? The very notion was madness!

Surely, in all the reports on his schooling, achievements, and developing skills, she would’ve gotten _some_ clue.

Wouldn’t she?

Maybe he’d been hiding it from everyone, enough that nothing even slipped out to be observed by unknowing persons and told to her.

There were so many unknowns, so many questions.

As if things weren’t tense enough.

Because on top of all these thoughts was the awareness that everyone was watching them both closely to see how they interacted and she felt very much on display.

Also, Audwin was studying her as closely as she studied him. 

A few times she would glance over and see him looking at her with that same, unreadable expression as when they were children, except this time he didn’t immediately look away, and certainly didn’t make faces at her.

He had that expression a lot, actually, at various times in the visit, and she was beginning to realize it was the face he made when deep in thought. 

She recognized a lot of expressions he’d made all those years ago, in the rare moments younger Audwin had been somewhat pleasant, including a light smirk with the left corner of his mouth curled upward when he was amused or satisfied. He also, like before, kept his chin lowered most of the time, although nowadays his height had probably made it a necessity for eye contact.

These mannerisms had annoyed her when they were little, simply because it was Audwin doing them. But now, she felt an inexplicable surge of fondness.

Honestly, she wasn’t entirely sure what she was feeling right now.

Signy was grateful that he was being pleasant so far, but she wasn’t sure what he was thinking.

Ms. Roslin was waiting for her in her chambers when the group dispersed. “So, how was it?”

“It went very well.” Signy told her. “He’s still Audwin, but… much more pleasant to me, and less annoying.”

“Excellent! What did you talk about?”

“Hm?” She couldn’t quite remember most of the conversations. “Well, the two of us didn’t really talk directly to each other that much…” 

“Oh. Well, that’s to be expected, I supposed.”

“Yeah.” She sat at her vanity and started brushing her hair, mostly just to give herself something to occupy her hands while her thoughts whirled around.

“You look worried, child. What is it?”

“Nothing. I’ve just got a lot on my mind.” 

“Are you still a bit nervous? That’s perfectly understandable, Signy.”

Signy paused.

Could she tell her?

At first it seemed like a bad idea, but Ms. Roslin was the best person to share this kind of secret with. The older woman was already privy to Signy’s habit of sneaking out into the woods, and had long ago ceased to stop her from doing so, though she would on occasion try to dissuade her if she thought it was particularly unwise. And though the news would doubtless shock and worry her, she wasn’t prone to overreacting, but usually kept her feet on the ground.

And maybe two minds thinking it over would solve the mystery faster than Signy could on her own.

She set her brush down and turned to face her former tutor. “Actually, there is something bothering me that may or may not involve Prince Audwin.”

“What is it?”

“Last night I went to the woods to unwind a bit.”

“I suspected.” Ms. Roslin Smiled a little. “The moment you asked to be alone.”

“Well, I met someone.”

Roslin’s smile dimmed. “Who?”

“That’s what’s bothering me.”

She explained everything, describing as much as she could remember from beginning to end. Ms. Roslin’s eyes slowly grew wider and wider as Signy told her about the unseen owl sorcerer, their conversation, hearing that Audwin sounded exactly like them, and anything else she could think of that might be relevant.

“And now, I don’t know what to do, or what to even think.” She finished.

“Oh my…” Ms. Roslin stared at some random spot on the wall, one hand clasped to her chest. “I’m not sure what I should think either.”

“I don’t know what’s going on in his head. Does he know that I know? Does he _want_ me to know?”

The other woman pressed fingers to her temple as if fighting a headache. “This is a little much for me to handle. I can’t fathom a reason for that man to learn magic, much less become adept at it.”

“There’s another thought that troubles me: if that person wasn’t Audwin, who were they?”

Ms. Roslin’s brows knotted. “You mean someone impersonating him?”

“Possibly. I couldn’t see any details… not their height, build, or even sex. It would probably be very easy to change one’s voice using magic.”

“But what purpose would that serve? What could anyone gain from it?”

“I have no idea.” Signy rose to her feet and paced around a bit. “I feel like I should do something… say something. But what?”

The older woman sighed. “We don’t know anything yet. It could all be as you said, and you’ll marry a man who just so happens to wield magic powers. There are worse things, I suppose.”

“But I hate not knowing!”

“I’m sure you’ll find out eventually. In the meantime, try not to do anything rash.”

“I at least want to know more about magic itself. It might give us some clues. Do you think there might be some books about it in the castle library?”

“Doubtful. But I suppose there’s no harm in looking.”

Roslin accompanied her to the library. To keep an eye on her, Signy guessed.

Of course, by perfect coincidence, the very man they’d been talking about was already in there, nose stuck in a book.

“ _Oh!_ ” Signy yelped in surprise, managing to startle him. “Audwin!”

“Signy.” He greeted, looking at her a bit guardedly, as if he half-suspected she might bite him.

“What are you…? I mean…” She cleared her throat. “Sorry. I wasn’t expecting to find you here.”

“So I gathered. I _was_ given permission to be in here.”

“Of course, you’re welcome to any of the books! I simply…” She glanced at Roslin, who was studying Audwin with an equally surprised look on her face. “I don’t believe you’ve met my governess, Ms. Roslin.”

He nodded at the older woman. “How do you do?”

“Fine, thank you.” Roslin’s expression dropped into a more neutral one. “Nice to finally meet you, Your Highness.”

Audwin smiled a bit, closing his book. “I’m sure you’ve heard some… colorful stories about me from the princess.”

“A bit, yes. Some of them grew more colorful over time.”

Signy blushed. “Well, she started working for us about the time my mother died, mostly as my tutor.” She explained.

“You must’ve had your work cut out for you.” Audwin commented. “Did she ever throw spit balls?”

“It had its own challenges.” Ms. Roslin answered, unperturbed. “Thankfully none of them involved saliva or projectiles.” 

Signy’s mouth actually fell open. Audwin raised both eyebrows. “Glad to hear it.”

Somehow, Signy knew her governess had managed to win the respect of this strange man.

Then she remembered the reason they were here in the first place. But they couldn’t just grab a book on magic and sorcery without getting his attention. Yet just up and leaving would arouse even more suspicion.

She quickly searched until her eyes lit upon the spine of a volume. “We were just looking for… ah, _A New System of Chemical Philosophy,_ by… Dalton.” 

“Sounds riveting.” Audwin remarked dryly. “Can I help? I can reach the higher shelves, as you’ve no doubt figured.”

“No need, I know where it is. But thank you.” She trotted over and pulled out the book.

“If nothing else, our marriage will eliminate your need for step-stools.” Audwin joked.

She couldn’t help but smile. “I didn’t think of that. I suppose it is a nice benefit.” She took Ms. Roslin’s arm and pulled her toward the door. “Well, this was lovely. See you again in at supper.”

“Farewell.” He called after them.

“Well," Signy sighed out in the hall. "That could've gone better. You don’t think he suspects anything, do you?”

“I haven’t the faintest idea.” Ms. Roslin glanced back over her shoulder. “So, that was Prince Audwin.”

“Mm-hm.”

She gave Signy a pointed look. “The one you called, ‘Weasel Face’?”

“Yes.”

“I don’t see it myself.”

“Enough about that. What are your impressions?”

“I’m afraid I don’t know. He seems charming enough, and affable. But I need much more to go by than a thirty-second conversation.”

Signy frowned at the scientific volume she’d brought with them. “Well, I guess all I can do is keep a close eye on him.”

“Shouldn’t be too hard. Looks-wise, you could’ve done much worse.”

“ _Ms. Roslin!”_

“Oh, don’t act so surprised, child. Just because I’m unmarried at forty-three doesn’t mean I’m blind.” She crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. “And judging from the way you look at him, I can deduce his features haven’t escaped your notice either.”

Signy’s face burned. “I couldn’t care less what he looks like!”

“Indeed.” The older woman responded, sounding a bit skeptical. 

* * *

By the time they’d all met in the dining room, Signy decided she’d had enough fretting.

She had already spent the last few weeks– no, the last few _years_ – anxious over seeing Audwin again, and now that she had, she was anxious over determining if her betrothed was really a shape-shifting wizard, and whether or not he might harbor any concerning motives. 

Well, for the rest of the night she was going to just enjoy the visit as much as she could. Lest people start worrying about why she kept getting lost in thought.

And there was still a sizable chance that everyone was right in assuring her that the marriage wouldn’t be a total disaster after all. In which case, she didn’t want to ruin it by suspecting her soon-to-be husband of nefarious aims when he had none.

Still, this wasn’t exactly the kind of setting in which she wanted to grow closer to the man she’d be spending the rest of her life with. Having everyone scrutinize your every move and word didn’t make for a successful courtship.

So she was more than grateful when, after finishing supper and returning to the sitting room, her father suggested Signy show Audwin the gardens in a ridiculously obvious attempt to get them alone.

“That sounds like a great idea! If it’s alright with him, that is.”

Ms. Roslin got a concerned look. “Erm, Is that really wise, Your Majesty? It’s getting a bit dark, and they may have trouble seeing around…”

In spite of her assurances, it seemed the older woman was still wary of leaving her former charge alone with a potential sorcerer, particularly one with no discernable motives, if he had any.

“There’s still enough light to see the flowers by.” Edward remarked. “And the gardeners will keep the lanterns lit along the main pathway, I’m sure they’ll be fine.”

“Yes but…”

Even knowing the circumstances, Signy didn’t feel worried about being alone with him. Instinct told her that he wouldn’t try anything untoward, magical or otherwise. 

“It’s probably the best time for it.” She said, giving Ms. Roslin a reassuring smile. “It'll be cool enough to enjoy a stroll. What do you say, Audwin?”

“I don’t suppose I have a choice.” He replied archly.

Aldous gave him a look that suggested he would’ve elbowed his twin in a less formal setting. “Audwin, _please_ …”

“Only joking. A walk actually doesn’t sound half bad.” He rose to his feet. “Lead the way, Princess.” 

* * *

Almost as soon as the passed the garden’s main entrance, Audwin muttered, “How much do you want to bet they’re watching us the whole time?”

Signy blushed a little. “Not sure I want to know the answer to that question.”

He shortened his long stride so she could keep up with him, folding his hands behind his back. “You know what we should do? Pretend to have a huge argument, just to mess with them.”

She laughed a little. “I guess that’s worth considering.”

For a few minutes they walked in simple silence. Audwin’s eyes swept the grounds, glancing over the flowers and shrubbery. It wasn’t awkward, per se. But it probably would become so if they didn’t start talking.

“So, what kind of books do you like?” Signy asked.

“Generally nonfiction.”

“What kind? Biology? History? Biographies?”

“A bit of everything, I suppose.”

“Uncle A… Our Chief Minister says you have an interest in ornithology.”

“If that’s a fancy way of saying ‘likes birds’, then yes.”

“I heard crows are your favorite” Her eyes darted up to his face to read possible reactions.

“You’d be surprised how interesting they are.” He answered, simply.

“Oh definitely. I’ve just been reading a little about them, and they’re _fascinating_.”

That caught his attention. “You think so?”

Signy smiled and nodded. “I read that they actually make tools, and sometimes gift items to other crows, or sometimes humans.”

He looked (dare she say) impressed. “That’s right. It’s usually to create or strengthen a bond of some sort.”

“What kind of things do they give?”

“Oh, shiny objects, snail shells, acorns, clothes pins… whatever catches their fancy.”

“Has a crow ever given you anything?”

He began to smile. “I have a whole _box_ full of gifts from crows.”

“Really?” The thought was more endearing than she expected.

“I’ve been leaving out food for them in a particular spot outside our castle grounds these last few years, and have gotten a whole collection of items they’ve given as thanks. Everything from a tiny wooden bear to lost jewelry.”

He was talking more easily and enthusiastically than he had all day, and Signy couldn’t deny she was happy to see it. “What’s the most interesting thing a crow’s given you?”

He thought for a moment. “I’d say it’s a tie between a snake’s shed skin, and a real freshwater pearl.”

“At least they didn’t give you the actual snake.” She remarked, making him chuckle. 

They continued talking about crows for a few minutes, then shifted to owls, then shifted to some interesting facts about elk, then wild hares, then several other forest animals. Then they both talked about some exotic animals neither had seen but had read about, then they started talking about many different subjects…

Before Signy knew it, the sun had almost completely set, and the gardeners were busy lighting the garden lanterns while trying to be unobtrusive. She and Audwin must’ve been talking for an hour, but it certainly hadn’t felt like it.

Where had this man been all these years? He was surprisingly easy for her to talk to, seemed to find what she said interesting, and they made each other laugh and smile. She could scarcely believe this was the boy she’d named her lifelong nemesis.

Everyone had been right all alone. Who’d have thought?

“Can I be honest with you?” She finally asked.

There was that smirk again. “I’ve never known you to be otherwise.”

“You’re way more fun now than when you were ten.”

“Glad someone thinks so.” He grimaced. “I was such a brat, wasn’t I?”

“Well… you _were_ pretty mean to me.”

“That was rotten of me, but it wasn’t anything personal. I had absolutely no control over what was happening, and I hated it. Plus, being a stubborn little snot, I chafed at how everyone was trying to _make_ me like you. So, I took it all out on you.”

Signy smiled. “Well, I was hardly better. I tried to keep my chin up and all that, but some part of me refused to take it lying down.”

“I don’t doubt that for a moment. Also, at that age I thought all girls were a nuisance.”

Signy gave him a teasing grin. “You weren’t afraid I’d give you cooties, were you?”

“Worse. I was afraid I’d end up liking you after all. At the time that seemed like a fate worse than death.”

She laughed.

“But my outlook’s changed: now I think _everyone’s_ a nuisance.”

Signy laughed again, harder. “Oh my… you’re a piece of work.”

Audwin shrugged. “I try.” Then his eyes met hers and she saw something… almost soft in them. “But I failed on one account.”

“What’s that?”

“I ended up liking you anyway.”

Her face grew warm and she looked away, but felt herself smile. “So… that’s why you kept staring at me?”

“Partly. Mostly I was just trying to figure you out.” 

When she looked back up, his smile had faded to a more serious look. “I was actually disappointed when we never saw each other again. But… I understood it wasn’t…” He trailed off a bit awkwardly.

Signy nodded. “I still have that letter you sent me after Mother died, and the sketch. I thought they were both really sweet.”

“Really? I had no idea what to say.” He admitted.

“You said exactly what I needed to hear.”

He smiled again. “I still have your response letter, if I could only remember where.”

“I responded?”

Everything had been so muddled together, so much had been happening in her life at that time, yet when she thought about it Signy faintly remembered writing a ‘thank you’ to _someone_. “I forgot I did that. What did it say?”

“You thanked me for showing I cared, and for the sketch, which you said was the best gift you’d gotten all year.”

That did sound familiar. It truly had been the best thing given to her in that miserable year, serving as a reminder that others remembered her mother’s warmth, and that even someone so mean as Audwin still had feelings.

“Even after getting that, I still thought I’d never like you.” She admitted. “But it was foolish of me to judge you by…”

She stopped herself as the familiar sentence suddenly popped into her head.

Audwin gave her a slow, secretive smile.

“…By my appearance, or first impressions.”

Signy's mouth fell open.

As if that wasn’t enough, his eyes very briefly flickered with a familiar purple light.

 _“I KNEW IT!”_ Signy blurted out triumphantly. “I KNEW THAT WAS YOU!!”

“Ssssshhh!” He hissed, holding a finger to his lips. “I’d rather not let the guards in on that secret!” 

She dropped her voice into a stage-whisper. “Good God, that really was you last night!”

He smiled impishly. “I _wondered_ when you’d say something.” 

Signy was grinning like mad now, so excited her intuition had been right. “I figured it out almost the moment I heard your voice this morning! I can’t believe it! You’re actually a sorcerer! That’s amazing!”

“Amazing? Not maddening? Intimidating? Frightening?”

“Not really. I mean… I wasn’t sure if you knew what I knew, or why you’d hidden it…”

“Because people tend to act funny around you when they know you can do magic.” His mouth turned down in distaste. “I generally don’t like to advertise it.”

“How did you learn it?”

“Around the last time our families met up together, my parents entertained a renowned sorceress at out castle. Long story short, she told me I had great potential, and offered to train me.”

“Who else knows?”

“Just my family, for now. My parents were understandably wary at first, but now give their full support.”

“What else can you do?”

“A lot of things. I can change the weather, transform things and people, make plants grow and items materialize… more things than I have time to tell you at the moment. But I will go into detail later.”

So many other questions were buzzing around her head, but she finally settled on the next one. “What were you doing in the woods last night?”

“Probably the same thing you were. I was… uneasy about today, so I went flying to clear my head and get fresh air.”

“You mean you were nervous?”

“Call it what you want.”

“And you did figure out who I was. I wondered…”

He smirked. “It wasn't that hard to figure out once you mentioned your fiancé's polite twin brother. Imagine my surprise when I realized the strange but interesting woman I’d run into was the very person I was anxious about seeing.”

She arched an eyebrow. “And you didn’t think to tell me who you were?”

He looked somewhat abashed and it was… kind of adorable. “Well, there was a chance I was wrong, and I felt like it would be a little less shocking if you figured it out for yourself.”

He was probably right. But she was still feeling a bit put-out. “That still doesn’t explain why you waited until now to confirm my suspicions.”

“Because I wasn’t really sure you’d actually figured it out yet.”

Signy gave a disbelieving laugh. “The shocked look on my face when you said ‘hello’ wasn’t proof enough?”

That smirk returned. “It _could’ve_ been shock at how bloody tall I’ve gotten.”

She laughed again. “That was pretty surprising, I’ll give you that.”

“Or that I was more handsome than you were expecting.” He teased.

Signy gave him an answering smirk. “True, it could’ve been.”

Dear Lord, was she actually flirting? With _Audwin?!_ Hades must’ve been experiencing some unusual weather right about now.

And she couldn’t help feeling a bit proud at the surprised amusement on his face.

Signy looked around, and realized how dark it had gotten. “We should probably head back.” She said reluctantly. “Before they start looking for us.”

“If you say so.” He took her hand as they walked back to the entrance, holding it lightly.

She internally sighed at the thought of returning to the center stage, rather than the privacy normal couples got to enjoy when bonding. But at the same time, everything was turning out far better than she could’ve hoped.

They’d do more than just tolerate each other. They’d grow closer, become good friends and companions, probably even confidants. He already trusted her with a big secret, and didn’t seem at all upset that she’d found it out.

As they drew near the glass doors, they could see the silhouettes of others gathered inside, pretending to chat when they were obviously watching for the couple’s return.

“Remember my idea?” Audwin asked, releasing her hand. “What should we argue about?”

She looked up at him, taking in the angles of his face, the curl of his devilish smile, and something like boldness but so much _more_ surged up in her chest.

Her heart began to race. “I know something that’ll drive them even crazier.”

“I’d love to hear it.”

“First let’s get closer.”

They stepped out of the shadows into the light streaming from indoors, just close enough for the others to see, and Signy waited until she could tell they’d gotten their attention.

“They’re watching.” Audwin whispered. “Now what?”

Signy faced him and motioned for him to bend down closer, as if she was going to whisper something.

When he did, she took his face in both hands and gave him a quick peck on the lips.

She thought she heard a small crash indoors.

Audwin jerked backward, looking understandably shocked, and Signy suddenly felt guilty for just presuming he would be alright with it.

“Sorry! I’m so sorry! I should’ve asked first! I… wasn’t thinking…!”

Then his expression melted into a warm smile that had her sagging with relief.

“I have no complaints.” He leaned down again and lightly took her chin with his thumb and forefinger. “After all, I’ve been wanting to do that since last night.”

She was smiling so wide her cheeks hurt. “Could you even see my face?”

“I knew you were Signy. That was enough.” And with that he closed the scant distance between their lips, his own soft and warm.

She forgot about his huge secret. She forgot about the people watching them (and probably cheering the long-awaited success of this match). She forgot everything except him.

And that, she later told their children (they ended up with five) was when she fell completely and utterly in love with her future husband.

And his wedding gift, a silver pendant with a freshwater pearl on one side and an owl etched on the other, only cemented it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So he liked her the whole time! (kinda')  
> The chemistry book Signy takes from the library is a real one, BTW.  
> Welp, this will probably be the last update to this collection for a couple months. Because I am preparing a treat for you lovely readers in honor of Valentine's day!  
> It's quite probable that It won't be finished before the 14th, maybe not until later that month, but I'm pretty sure I'll finish it sometime in February.


	13. AUTHOR'S NOTE

Nobody be alarmed, this is just a notice to my readers whom I promised the belated Valentine's day special. 

It's still coming. I'm working on it as we speak. But it's taking considerably longer than I thought. Hopefully I'll finish it by the end of the month, but it's possible that won't happen. 

It's not super duper long, but it's certainly longer than any single chapter on this collection, and I'm holding it to a higher standard, so things are going slower. 

I'll delete this note once I've posted it. That's all. 

Have a good day. ❤

**Author's Note:**

> I... have no excuse. Except that I am one thirsty dame.


End file.
